Two friends:
Tonight I am going to organize a group sex session in my apartment.
Do you want to come?
Of course! How many people are coming?
Three, if you bring your girlfriend.
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How can you make your wife scream for an hour after sex?
Wipe your dick on the curtains.
The sexologist to Johny: "let´s talk about sex!"
Johny: "I have no idea."
Vote:
Are you an elevator?
Cause I wanna go down on you.
"Grandma, in the greengrocery they have that thick and that long cucumber."
Deaf grandma answers,"be sure he'll also marry you."
‘I recently sold the rights of my love life to Parker brothers, they’re going to turn it into a game.’ Woody Allen
This 12 year old boy was in bed when he heard his mother moaning. He
decided that he'd go see whats wrong with her.
When he looked in his
mothers room he saw that she was laying on her bed naked and rubbing
herself and saying"I need a man, I need a man"
So this quite a few times and then one night he heard his mother again,
but this time her moaning sounded different, so he went to go check it
out, this time instead of seeing his mother alone, he sees his mother in
bed with a man. So the boy runs back to his room, strips all his
clothes off, jumps on the bed and starts rubbing himself while saying "I
need a bike, I need a bike"!!!!!
Vote:
Q: Why don't Canadians have group sex?
A: Too many thank-you letters to write afterwards.
If we were both squirrels, would you let me bust a nut in your hole?
We're like hot chocolate and marshmallows...
You're hot and I wanna be on top of you.