Joke #2652

Mom: What did you do at school today? Mark: We did a guessing game. Mom: But I thought you were having a math exam. Mark: That’s right!

Did anyone ever notice that "STUDYING" is a mixture of STUDY and DYING?

What kind of food do maths teachers eat? Square meals!

Q: How did the pirate get through School? A: By sailing on high C's.

In school, we had to do a skit demonstrating key concepts of the English language. My skit on the "diphthong" clearly demonstrated that the string micro-bikini was not a wise choice.

Teacher: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water? Donald: H-I-J-K-L-M-N-O. Teacher: What are you talking about? Donald: Yesterday you said it was H to O.

Chuck Norris didn't go to school to learn, he went to teach.

Four high school boys afflicted with spring fever skipped morning classes. After lunch they reported to the teacher that they had a flat tire. Much to their relief she smiled and said, "Well, you missed a test today so take seats apart from one another and take out a piece of paper." Still smiling, she waited for them to sit down. Then she said, "First Question was which tire was flat?"

Little Johnny was at school one day when the teacher asked the kids if they could use the word definitely in a sentence. Well the first little girl raised her hand and said, "Well the trees are definitely green." The teacher said "No not really because the trees turn yellow red and brown in the fall." The next little boy raised his hand and said, "The sky is definitely blue." The teacher said, "No not really because the sky can be all different colors." From the back of the room little Johnny raised his hand and asked, "Do farts have lumps?" The teacher said, "No Johnny of course not, that’s silly." Then Johnny said, "Well then I definitely shit my pants!"

You are so old, you sat next to Jesus in school.

When you try to change a man, you basically undertake his mother’s role; And she made him eat spinach and study for school...