Joke #1665

Father: "You've got 4 D's and a C on your report." Son: "Maybe I concentrated too much on the one subject..."

Teacher: "Are you good at math?" Pupil: "Yes and no." Teacher: "What do you mean?" Pupil: "Yes, I'm no good at math!"

"Well, children," said the cannibal cooking teacher. "What did you make of the new English teacher?" "Burgers, ma'am."

Yo momma so fat that when she went to her prom she literally raised the roof.

Three boys are walking home from school and they see a naked woman. One of them runs away the other two stay to watch. The next day they are walking home from school and they see the naked woman again, and again the same boy runs away. Another day later they are walking home and they see the naked woman again, as the boy tries to run away the other boys grab him and ask, "What are you gay or something don't you like looking at naked women?" He replied, "Yeah, I love looking at naked women but my mom said that if I see one I'll turn into stone and I feel something starting to get hard."

What would you get if you crossed a vampire and a teacher? Lots of blood tests!

English Class Teacher: "One day we will be corruption free. Which tense is it?" Student: "Future impossible tense."

The following conversation took place in school. Teacher: "So we are all descended from Adam and Eve." Young kid: "My dad says we came from apes." Teacher: "That's probably true for your family Abdul."

When a teacher closes his eyes, why should it remind him of an empty classroom? Because there are no pupils to see!

An announcement came over the intercom for the college students: "Will the students who are parked on the wrong side of the Parking area please move their cars." Twenty minutes later there was another announcement: "Will the three hundred students who went to move fourteen cars return to class."

Jane was sitting in anatomy class on day when her teacher asked her a question. He inquired, “What grows to 10 times its original size when excited?” Jane blushed and said that she didn't know. Jimmy raised his hand and said, “I know! The pupil of the eye.” The teacher replied, “Yes, very good Jimmy.” The the teacher turned to Jane and said, “Jane I have three things to say to you: One -- you have a very dirty mind. Two -- you haven't been studying hard enough. And three -- you're going to be very disappointed!”