Joke #272

Q. How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? A1. "What's a light bulb?" A2. One. She holds the bulb and the world revolves around her. A3. Two. One to hold the Diet Pepsi, and one to call, "Daaady!"

Q: Why did the blonde have blisters on her lips? A: From trying to blow out light bulbs.

How many blonde does it take to change a lightbulb? A: 3. One to hold the lightbulb and two to turn the ladder.

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1001.....1 to hold the light bulb and 1000 to turn the house.

Q: How many Anglicans or Catholics does it take to change a light bulb? A: None. They always use candles.

How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb? ONE......He just holds it up there and waits for the world to revolve around him.

Q: What do you call a blonde at a golf course? A: The 19th hole.

Q: How many Apple Iphone 6 early adopters does it take to change a light bulb? A: 3001. 1 to do the work and 3000 to go online and bitch about the lack of obscure features!

Two factory workers are talking. The woman says, "I can make the boss give me the day off." The man replies, "And how would you do that?" The woman says, "Just wait and see." She then hangs upside-down from the ceiling. The boss comes in and says, "What are you doing?" The woman replies, "I'm a light bulb." The boss then says, "You've been working so much that you've gone crazy. I think you need to take the day off." The man starts to follow her and the boss says, "Where are you going?" The man says, "I'm going home, too. I can't work in the dark."

A blonde girl was talking to her redhead friend about her boyfriend's dandruff problem. The redhead says "Why don't you give him Head and Shoulders?" The blonde replies, "How do you give shoulders?"

Q: How many Republicans does it take to change a light bulb? A: Three. One to hire a Mexican guy and two to deport him when he's done.