Joke #2757

Teacher: “You know you can’t sleep in my class.” Boy: “I know. But maybe if you were just a little quieter, I could.”

"Dad, can you help me find the lowest common denominator in this problem please?" "Don't tell me that they haven't found it yet, I remember looking for it when I was a boy!"

The answer to the problem was “log(1+x)”. A student copied the answer from the student next to him, but didn’t want to make it obvious that he was cheating, so he changed the answer slightly, to “timber(1+x).”

Teacher: "Which is more important to us, the sun or the moon?" Ramu: "The moon". Teacher: "Why?" Ramu: "The moon gives us light at night when we need it but the sun gives us light only in the day time when we don't need it".

“If there are any idiots in the room, will they please stand up” said the sarcastic teacher. After a long silence, one freshman rose to his feet. “Now then, mister, why do you consider yourself an idiot?” enquired the teacher with a sneer. “Well, actually I don’t,” said the student, “but I hate to see you standing up there all by yourself.”

Little Johnny's father farted. The son asked his father: "What was that?" His father said: "My sweet that is 'north wind'" When he went to school the teacher asked the class: "Who knows the direction of the north wind? Little Johnny shouted: "My daddy's ass!"

In high school, teachers had to raise up their hand to speak to Chuck Norris.

Q: How do you know when an Asian robs your house? A: Your technology has been upgraded, your homework is finished, but he's still trying to back out of your drive way.

Mother: What did you learn in school today Son: How to write. Mother: What did you write? Son: I don't know, they haven't taught us how to read yet!

Teacher: What makes you see? Bobyjack: My eyes, my nose and my ears. Teacher: True for the eyes but why for your ears and nose? Bobyjack: It's to hold my glasses!

One recent Sunday, a young boy arrived to his Sunday school class late. His teacher knew that the boy was usually very prompt and asked him if anything was wrong. The boy replied no, that he was going to go fishing, but that his dad told him that he needed to go to church instead. The teacher was very impressed and asked the boy if his father had explained to him why it was more important to go to church rather than to go fishing. To which the boy replied, "Yes, ma'am, he did. My dad said that he didn't have enough bait for both of us."