Who may open the door without using hands, nor legs? An invalid. 
Vote:
Similar jokes
See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.
"If I could be someone for one day I would be Justin Beiber and run off a cliff"
Vote:
What's funnier than a dead baby?
A dead baby in a clown costume!
Vote:
Little Melissa comes home from first grade and tells her father that they learned about the history of Valentine's Day.
"Since Valentine's Day is a Christian saint and we're Jewish," she asks, "will God get mad at me for giving someone a valentine?"
Melissa's father thinks a bit, then says, "No, I don't think God would get mad. Who do you want to give a valentine to?"
"Osama Bin Laden," she says.
"Why Osama Bin Laden?" her father asks in shock.
"Well," she says, "I thought that if a little American Jewish girl could have enough love to give Osama a valentine, he might start to think that maybe we're not all bad, and maybe start loving people a little bit. And if other kids saw what I did and sent valentines to Osama, he'd love everyone a lot. And then he'd start going all over the place to tell everyone how much he loved them and how he didn't hate anyone anymore."
Her father's heart swells and he looks at his daughter with pride. "Melissa, that's the most wonderful thing I've ever heard."
"I know," Melissa says, "and once that gets him out in the open, the Marines could blow the crap out of him."
Vote:
Joke has 71.35 % from 91 votes. More jokes about: black humor, love, navy, religious, Valentines day
Why did Osama Bin Laden kill his wife?
When she spread her legs he saw bush.
Vote:
The worst place to have a heart attack is during a gama of cherades.
...Especially if the people you are playing with, are really bad guessers.
Vote:
What do you call a virgin on a waterbed?
A cherry float.
Vote:
What is the difference between a fridge and a kid?
A fridge doesn't shout when you put your meat inside it.
Vote:
Knock-knock
Who is there?
A shattered penis with many diseases.
What kind of illness?
Gall, Aids, Gonorrhea, Syphilis...
Enough, it is the best present for my mother in law.
Vote:
Joke has 63.58 % from 608 votes. More jokes about: black humor, health, knock-knock, mother in law, vulgar
Girl: "Do you believe in puppy love?"
Boy: "I tried it once, but their assholes are too small."
A hunter visited another hunter and was given a tour of his home.
In the den was a stuffed lion.
The visiting hunter asked, “When did you bag him?”
The host said proudly, “That was three years ago, when I went hunting with my ex-wife.”
“What’s he stuffed with,” asked the visiting hunter.
“My ex-wife” replied the hunter.
Vote: