The answer to the problem was “log(1+x)”. A student copied the answer from the student next to him, but didn’t want to make it obvious that he was cheating, so he changed the answer slightly, to “timber(1+x).”
A teacher noticed that a little boy at the back of the class, was squirming around, scratching his crotch and not paying attention. She went back to find out what was going on. He was quite embarrassed and whispered that he had just recently been circumcised and he was quite itchy. The teacher told him to go down to the principal’s office; he was to phone his mother and ask her what he should do about it. He did, and returned to his class. Suddenly, there was a commotion at the back of the room. She went back to investigate only to find him sitting at his desk with his penis hanging out. "I thought I told you to call your Mom," she screamed. "I did," he said, "and she told me that if I could stick it out till noon, she’d come and pick me up from school."
When you try to change a man, you basically undertake his mother’s role; And she made him eat spinach and study for school...
Teacher: "Sam, what is the outside of a tree called?" Sam: "I don't know." Teacher: "Bark, Sam, bark." Sam: "Bow, wow, wow!"
Little Johnny's first grade class was playing "Name That Animal." The teacher held up a picture of a cat and asked, "What animal is this?" "A cat!" said Suzy. "Good job. Now, what's this animal?" "A dog!" said Ricky. "Good. Now what animal is this?" she asked, holding up a picture of a deer. The class fell silent. After a couple of minutes, the teacher said, "It's what your mom calls your dad." "I know!" called out Little Johnny. "A horny bastard!"
Teacher: Why are you late? Ramu: Because of the sign. Teacher: What sign? Ramu: The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow."
Teacher: "In 1940, what were the Poles doing in Russia?" Pupil: "Holding up the telegraph lines!"
The parents were very disappointed in the grades that their son brought home. “The only consolation I can find in these awful grades,” lamented the father, “is that I know he never cheated during his exams.”
Tyrone' s 1st day in the first grade he comes home crying. When his mother ask why he replays. "The teacher told us to say our abc' s and all the little white boys could say them and I could only get to e why is that." Mom says "cause u black and they white." Next day Tyrone is crying again . "What's wrong today Tyrone" his mother ask. Tyrone said "teacher told us to count to 100 and all the little white boys did but I could only get to 10 why is that." Mom says "cause u black and they white." Next day he comes home smiling. "What happened today Tyrone?" Tyrone says mama "we went to the bathroom and my thing was biggest of all . Is that cause I'm black and they white." Mama says "no Tyrone it's cause u 17 and they 6."
Teacher:Maria please point to America on the map. Maria:This is it. Teacher:Well done. Now class, who found America? Class:Maria did.
A minister told his congregation, "Next week I plan to preach about the sin of lying. To help you understand my sermon, I want you all to read Mark 17." The following Sunday, as he prepared to deliver his sermon, the minister asked for a show of hands. He wanted to know how many had read Mark 17. Every hand went up. The minister smiled and said, "Mark has only sixteen chapters. I will now proceed with my sermon on the sin of lying."