Joke #2872

How do you call a Triceratops with horns on his butt? Tricera-bottoms.
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has 39.32 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: animal

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What's a rabbits favorite movie? Rabbits of the Lost Ark.
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has 56.86 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: animal
Q: Did you hear about the dyslexic, agnostic insomniac? A: He stayed up all night wondering if there was a dog.
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has 67.68 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: animal
One day a farmer's donkey fell down into a well. The animal cried piteously for hours as the farmer tried to figure out what to do. Finally, he decided the animal was old, and the well needed to be covered up anyway; it just wasn't worth it to retrieve the donkey. He invited all his neighbors to come over and help him. They all grabbed a shovel and began to shovel dirt into the well. At first, the donkey realized what was happening and cried horribly. Then, to everyone's amazement he quieted down. A few shovel loads later, the farmer finally looked down the well. He was astonished at what he saw. With each shovel of dirt that hit his back, the donkey was doing something amazing. He would shake it off and take a step up. As the farmer's neighbors continued to shovel dirt on top of the animal, he would shake it off and take a step up. Pretty soon, everyone was amazed as the donkey stepped up over the edge of the well and happily trotted off! Life is going to shovel dirt on you, all kinds of dirt. The trick to getting out of the well is to shake it off and take a step up. Each of our troubles is a steppingstone. We can get out of the deepest wells just by not stopping, never giving up! Shake it off and take a step up. NOW -------- Enough of that crap... The donkey later came back and bit the shit out of the farmer who had tried to bury him. The gash from the bite got infected, and the farmer eventually died in agony from septic shock. MORAL FROM TODAY'S LESSON: When you do something wrong and try to cover your ass, it always comes back to bite you.
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has 64.88 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: animal
What do cows get when they are sick? Hay Fever.
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has 54.26 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: animal, health
What is slimy and wobbly, tastes of raspberry and lives in the seas? A red jellyfish.
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has 54.26 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: animal
Q: Whats worse then finding half a worm in your apple? A: The Holocaust.
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has 46.70 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: animal, black humor, food
What do you call a frog with no legs? It doesn't matter- he won't come anyway.
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has 33.37 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: animal
Well, a man was driving down a country road, and he decided to get out and get some fresh air. He got out, and started walking in a meadow. As he walked, he came upon a hole. Wanting to see how deep it was, he threw a pebble down. No sound. So he threw a medium-sized rock down. No sound. The man started to get frustrated, so he threw a boulder down. No sound. As he searched about, he spotted a railroad beam. He hauled it over to the hole, and shoved it in. No sound. He sat down on the ground, exhausted. Suddenly, he saw a goat running at him, full speed. He leaped up, and it brushed past him, and fell in the hole. He listened, but there was no sound. He sat down again. A few minutes later, a farmer came walking up. The man asked him, "How deep is this hole?" The farmer said, "Oh. Thats the bottomless pit. It never ends. Say, have you seen my prize goat?" The man, not wanting to get the blame, said, "No." The farmer said, "Oh well. He can't get far. He was tied to a railroad beam."
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has 40.95 % from 7 votes. More jokes about: animal
Zebras are just horses that escaped from prison.
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has 29.10 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: animal, prison
Everybody knows that Chuck Norris can't shoot a bow even though he got 5 bullseyes in a row. The only reason he got the bullseye is that his arrows know better than to miss.
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has 54.15 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris