Police Officer: "How high are you?"
Pothead: "No officer, it's "Hi, How are you?"
Similar jokes
See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.
Officer: "your eyes look red man have you been smoking weed."
Suspect: "officer your eyes look glazed like you has had doughnuts."
Q: If there are two potheads in the back of a car, then who is driving?
A: The cop!
Q: How long does it take before a pound of weed goes bad?
A: I don't know! I've never had it longer than an hour!
What do women and police cars have in common?
They both make a lot of noise to let you know they are coming.
Q: What did the Alabama Sheriff call the black man who shot himself 15 times?
A: The worst suicide case he has ever seen.
Vote:
Aunt's Pay A young lady went to the dress shop where her aunt worked and picked up her aunt's pay.
On the way home she was robbed, so she called the police and said, "I just lost my aunt's pay."
The desk sargeant said , "Ouyay, Unnyfay!"
The man was in no shape to drive, so he wisely left his car parked and walked home.
As he was walking unsteadily along, he was stopped by a policeman.
"What are you doing out here at 2 A.M.?" said the officer.
"I'm going to a lecture." the man said.
"And who is going to give a lecture at this hour?" the cop asked.
"My wife." said the man.
Q: How did the sand get wet?
A: The sea weed!
Yo Momma so stupid, she thought seaweed is something fish smoke.
There are three moms.
A Brunette, a Redhead, and a Blonde.
They were all talking one day and the brunette says "Oh my gosh y'all I went through my daughter's purse the other day to get some gum, and I found an ounce of weed.
I cannot believe she smokes weed"
They comfort her, and the redhead says "Yeah, well I found a fake I. D. In my daughter's purse.
I cannot believe she has one". So they all comfort her.
Then the blonde says "That's nothing. I found a condom in my daughter's purse.
I just cannot believe she has a penis"