Q. What do gay kids get for Christmas?
A. Erection Sets.
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What happens when a dwarf runs between a girls legs?
He gets a clit around the head and a flap on the face.
If your right leg was Halloween and the other one was Christmas I would have come visit you between the holidays.
Q: How do you know a gay guy has farted?
A: He needs to change his pants afterward.
An elderly gentleman went to see his doctor and asked for a prescription of Viagra.
The doctor said, “That’s no problem. How many do you want?”
The man answered, “Just a few, maybe 4, but cut each one in 4 pieces.”
The doctor said, “That won’t do you any good.”
The elderly gentleman said, “That’s all right. I don’t need them for sex anymore as I am over 90 years old. I just want it to stick out far enough so I don’t pee on my shoes.”
Vote:
What do a gynecologist, and a pizza delivery guy have in common?
They both can smell it, but they can't eat it!
One night Little Johnny was really scared sleeping by himself at camp, so he sprints out of his tent and runs to his teachers tent and asks "Miss can I please sleep with you tonight ?".
His teacher replies "NO"
Johnny moans and says "But my mummy lets me".
"OK then, just for tonight" the teacher replies.
Johnny jumps into bed with her and asks "Miss can I please play with your belly button with my finger".
She again says "NO".
"But my mummy lets me" says Johnny again.
"Well I suppose it's OK" replies the teacher.
Things are silent for a few minutes until the teacher leaps up screaming "THAT'S NOT MY BELLY BUTTON"
Little Johnny replies "It aint my finger either".
Vote:
I lost my virginity.
Can I have yours?
A man limps into a bar with a cane and alligator.
The bartender stops him and says "Hold on a second here - you can't bring that animal in here, they aren't allowed!"
So the man says, "But my gator here does a really cool trick..."
The bartender says "Well then, lets see!"
So the man whips out his dick and shoves it in the gators mouth.
He then takes his cane and starts bashing the gator in the head with it.
A crowd gathers around and everyone is astonished when he pulls out his dick without a single scratch.
He looks around at the crowd and says, "Does anyone else want to try?"
An old lady raises her hand and says..."Sure, but don't hit me with that stick."
A man says to his wife, ‘You know what, two inches more and I’d be king.’
She replies, ‘Two inches less and you’d be queen.’