Joke #3410

Q: Why are there no brunette jokes? A: Because blondes would have to think them up.

A blonde was sick and tired of people making fun of her for being a blonde, so she decided to hang herself. A couple minutes later two men walk by and see her hanging by her wrists. "What are you doing." they ask her. So she replies "Hanging myself." The men are confused and asked "If you are hanging youself, you put the rope around your neck." The blond says "Duh....I tried that, I couldn't breath."

Q: Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A: A mosquito stops sucking when you slap it...

What do you do when a blonde throws a grenade at you? Pull the pin and throw it back

Two blonds were driving to Disneyland. The sing said: Disneyland Left. So they started crying and headed home.

A blonde, a priest, a doctor, a nurse, a brunette, a redhead, a lawyer, a rabbi, a musician, a farmer, a lawyer, an accountant, a Mexican, an Indian, a Chinaman, an Irishman, an Englishman an American, A Russian, an Iraqi, Hilary Clinton, Bill Clinton, Sarah Palin, George W Bush, Osama Bin laden and Barack Obama walked into a bar. The barman said, "Hang on a minute, is this some sort of joke?"

A Blonde was down on her luck. In order to raise some money, she decided to kidnap a kid and hold him for ransom. She went to the playground, grabbed a kid, took him behind a tree, and told him, "I've kidnapped you." She then wrote a note saying, "I've kidnapped your kid. Tomorrow morning put $10,000 in a paper bag and put it under the pecan tree next to the slide on the North side of the playground. Signed, A Blonde." The Blonde then pinned the note to the kid's shirt and sent him home to show it to his parents. The next morning the Blonde checked, and sure enough, a paper bag was sitting beneath the pecan tree. The Blonde opened up the bag and found the $10,000 with a note that said, "How could you do this to a fellow Blonde?"

What are the six worst years in a blonde’s life? Third grade.

What do UFO's and smart blondes have in common? "You keep hearing about them, but never see any."

What did the blonde say when she looked into a box of Cheerios? ‘Oh look! Doughnut seeds!’

Did you hear about the blonde who thought Doris Day was a national holiday?