Joke #3442

If you want to know why men are called the 'opposite sex', express an opinion!
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Why does the stupid man put ice in his condom? To keep the swelling down.
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What's the difference between a man and a messy room? You can straighten up a messy room.
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What does a man make best for dinner? Reservations.
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John asks his wife, Mary, what she wants to celebrate their 40th wedding anniversary. “Would you like a new Mink Coat?” he asks. “Not really,” says Mary. “Well how about a new Mercedes sports car?” says John. “No,” she responds. “What about a new vacation home in the country?” he suggests. She again rejects his offer with a, “No thanks.” Frustrated he finally asks, “Well what would you like for your anniversary?” “John, I’d like a divorce,” answers Mary. John thinks for a moment and replies “Sorry dear, I wasn’t planning to spend that much.”
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Men are like.....Commercials. You can't believe a word they say
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What does a man call true love? An erection.
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