What's the difference between Big Foot and an intelligent man? Big Foot's been spotted several times.
Did you hear about the man who won the gold medal at the Olympics? He had it bronzed.
How can you tell the difference between men's real gifts and their guilt gifts? Guilt gifts are nicer.
Lost my watch at a party once. Saw a guy stepping on it while sexually harassing a girl. I walked up to the dude, punched him straight in the nose. No one does that to a girl, not on my watch.
Why don't men have mid-life crises? They stay stuck in adolescence.
Men and women were created equal but women continued to improve.
One day a man was walking along the beach and found a bottle. He looked around and didn't see anyone so he opened it. A genie appeared and thanked the man for letting him out. The genie said, "For your kindness I will grant you a wish, but only one." The man thought for a minute and said, "I have always wanted to visit Hawaii but have never been able to because I'm afraid of flying and ships make me seasick. So I wish for a road to be built from here to Hawaii." The genie thought for a minute and said, "No, I don't think I can do that. Just think of all the work involved: the pilings needed to hold up the highway, how deep they would have to be to reach the bottom of the ocean. Think of all the pavement that would be needed. No, that is just too much to ask." The man thought for a minute and then told the genie, "Well, there is one other thing that I have always wanted. I would like to be able to understand my girlfriend. What makes her laugh and cry, why is she temperamental, why is she so difficult to get along with? Basically, what makes her tick?" The genie considered for a few minutes and said, "So, do you want two lanes or four?"
Why is sleeping with a man like a soap opera? Just when it's getting interesting, they're finished until next time.
Why are blonde jokes so short? So men can remember them.
Why do men want to marry virgins? They can't stand criticism.