Joke #3443

How do you know if your man is dead? The sex is the same, but there's less ironing.
Vote: has 35.23 % from 10 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: men

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

A true gentleman holds the door for his woman... then smacks her ass as she walks by.
Vote: has 63.00 % from 24 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: men
A woman arrived at a party. While scanning the guests, she spotted an attractive man standing alone. She approached him, smiled and said, "Hello. My name is Carmen." "That’s a beautiful name," he replied. "Is it a family name?" "No," she replied. "As a matter of fact I gave it to myself. It represents the things that I enjoy the most – cars and men. Therefore I chose 'Carmen'" "What’s your name?” she asked. He answered "B. J. Titsengolf."
Vote: has 81.79 % from 114 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: car, family, golf, men, women
A man is moaning to his mate that he never has any luck with pulling women. His mate tells him he has a chat up line that never fails, no matter how good looking the women are he always ends up in bed with them. Great says his mate, what is it! Just walk up to any woman you fancy and say, "Excuse me love, could I ask your opinion! Does this damp piece of cloth smell like chloroform to you?"
Vote: has 70.40 % from 22 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: men
I hear Taylor Swift's ex boyfriends are collabing on a new single called "Maybe You're The Problem".
Vote: has 68.56 % from 33 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: celebrity, men, music, relationship
What do men and sperm have in common? They both have a one-in-a-million chance of becoming a human being.
Vote: has 40.95 % from 7 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: men
Two hunters shot a deer, and were dragging him to the car by the hind leg, which was difficult because the other legs kept snagging in the brush. "Chet, I've got an idea, I think we are doing this wrong. Let's try dragging him by the horns, like we were advised by the ammo-store salesman." "OK," says Ivan. After a while, Ivan says, "I think this is a lot better because his legs fold up and don't get caught in the brush, but we seem to be getting farther from the car."
Vote: has 40.95 % from 7 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: men
A lady calls the police to report her husband is missing. The police arrive and ask for a description. She tells them he's 6 foot 2 inches tall, blonde wavy hair and has a smile that makes everybody love him. The police then go to the next door neighbor to verify this report and the lady next door tells the police, "You can't believe her. He's 5 foot 4 inches tall, has no hair and he wears a perpetual frown on his face." The neighbor then goes and asks the lady why she gave the police such a false report. She replies, "Just because I reported him missing, doesn't mean I wanted him back!"
Vote: has 49.51 % from 14 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: cop, love, men
How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper? Who knows? - It hasn't happened yet!!
Vote: has 39.47 % from 11 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: men
Men are like.....Department Stores. Their clothes should always be half off.
Vote: has 19.47 % from 10 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: men
What's the difference between an intelligent man and a UFO? I don't know, I've never seen either one.
Vote: has 24.26 % from 11 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: men