A Husband comes home with a half gallon of Ice Cream.
He asked his wife if she wants some.
"How hard is it?" she asked.
"About as hard as my dick," he replies.
To which the woman replied, "OK, then pour me some!"
Similar jokes
See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.
Q: Why are Christmas trees better than Men?
A: Even the small ones give satisfaction.
The sexologist to Johny: "let´s talk about sex!"
Johny: "I have no idea."
Vote:
Is it still rape if you yell 'Surprise!' first?
Vote:
An old football player was dying.
So he called her wife and told her: "My dearest you see I'm dying. May you confess how many times you have done betrays against me during your life?"
Her spouse said: "Forgive me, my dear, only 3 times:
1. Do you remember it was so difficult to admit you as a football player in the team? So I went to the couch and did something. That was the cause for you to be a player in the team.
2. Do you remember when you entered the team no body didn't pass you? I went to 10 others players so they changed a friendly treatment during half times.
3. Do you remember during matching nobody of 30000 viewers didn't encourage you? I did something..."
Vote:
A man has came over to his wife in a request.
She tells him to tie her to a bed and do whatever he wants.
3 hours later he is fucking hookers and watching football and porn with friend.
how come blondes don't wear tampons?
so their crabs don't go bungie jumping.
How do girls get minks?
The same way minks get minks.
Dad: Hey son, if you keep masturbating your going to go blind.
Son: Dad im over here.
Vote:
If your right leg was Halloween and the other one was Christmas I would have come visit you between the holidays.
The teacher had given the class an assignment.
He stressed the importance of this particular assignment, and that no excuses would be accepted except illness or a death in the immediate family.
A smart-ass student pipes up: "What about extreme sexual exhaustion, sir?"
The class breaks up laughing, and when they settle down the teacher responds with: "Well, I guess you'll have to learn to write with your other hand."