Q. What did the elephant say to the naked man?
A. "How do you breathe through something so small?"
Similar jokes
See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.
Chuck Norris once walked in the opposite direction in the Running of the Bulls.
The bulls turned around and ran for their lives.
Vote:
Chuck Norris bit a spider once then it became Spiderman!
Vote:
The old mosquito puts the little baby’s to bed and tells them:
If you are good, tomorrow I’m going to take you to the nudists.
What does a squid sheriff form?
An octoposse.
Q: Why did Mozart kill all his chickens?
A: Because when he asked them who the best composer was, they'd all say: "Bach, Bach, Bach."
What is a buttress?
A female goat.
What's the difference between Beer Nuts and Deer Nuts?
Deer Nuts are always under a buck.
At the pet shop, a man spots a parrot without any feet.
The man leans in, "Hey buddy, how do you hang onto your perch without any feet?"
"I wrap my little parrot penis around this wooden bar, kind of like a hook."
"Wow," says the guy. "I can't believe you're so smart! I'm taking you home."
Weeks go by, and the parrot not only understands everything the man says, but he gives good advice.
The guy is delighted.
One day the guy comes home from work and the parrot says, "Hey, I don't know if I should tell you this or not, but it's about your wife and the mailman."
"What happened?" asks the guy.
"Well," the parrot says, "when the mailman came to the door today, your wife greeted him in a sheer nightgown and kissed him on the mouth."
"What happened then?" asks the guy.
"Then, the mailman came into the house and lifted up your wife's nightgown," reports the parrot.
"Oh no!" the guy says. "Then what?"
"I don't know," says the parrot. "I got a hard-on and fell off my perch."
“Mister, why doesn’t this cow have any horns?” asked the young lady from a nearby city.
The farmer cocked his head for a moment, then began in a patient tone, “Well, ma’am, cattle can do a powerful lot of damage with horns. Sometimes we keep’em trimmed down with a hacksaw. Other times we can fix up the young ‘uns by puttin’ a couple drops of acid where their horns would grow in, and that stops ‘em cold. Still, there are some breeds of cattle that never grow horns.But the reason this cow don’t have no horns, ma’am, is ’cause it’s a horse.”