What do you call a gay dinosaur?…… Mega-sore-ass.
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Mama Raptor and Papa Raptor were in court getting a divorce and the judge offered Baby Raptor a choice of which parent to live with.
JUDGE: "Do you want to live with your mother?"
BABY RAPTOR: "No! She beats me."
JUDGE: "OK, then you can live with your father."
BABY RAPTOR: "No! He beats me too!"
JUDGE: "Well you have to live with someone. Who do you want to live with?"
BABY RAPTOR: "I want to live with my Aunt Bertha in Toronto."
JUDGE: "Is there any chance she'll beat you also?"
BABY RAPTOR: "No sir. The Toronto Raptors don't beat anybody."
What do you call a lesbian dinosaur?
a lickalotapus.
Q: What's the nickname for someone who put their right hand in the mouth of a T-Rex?
A: Lefty.
Vote:
Will I ever be able to race my horse again the owner asked the vet.
The vet replied, "You certainly will, and you ll probably beat her too!"
Why do lions always eat raw meat?
"Because they don't know how to cook."
Q: Why did Mozart kill all his chickens?
A: Because when he asked them who the best composer was, they'd all say: "Bach, Bach, Bach."
A meteor did not kill the dinosaurs, Chuck Norris just went on a hunting trip.
Vote:
Yo mama is so fat she made all the dinosaurs extinct.
Yesterday I saw a man trying to chat up a cheetah.
‘Hello,’ I thought.
‘He’s trying to pull a fast one.’
Three rabbits escape from a testing lab and find an entire field full of carrots.
They eat themselves into a stupor and sleep throughout the night.
The next morning, they find an entire field full of female rabbits with no males in sight.
They screw themselves into a stupor and sleep throughout the night.
The next morning, the rabbits get to talking.
"I'm gonna go back to that field of carrots," says one.
"I'm gonna go back to those cute little rabbits," says the second.
"I'm going back to the lab," says the third. "I'm dying for a cigarette."