What do you call a gay dinosaur?…… Mega-sore-ass.
Mama Raptor and Papa Raptor were in court getting a divorce and the judge offered Baby Raptor a choice of which parent to live with. JUDGE: "Do you want to live with your mother?" BABY RAPTOR: "No! She beats me." JUDGE: "OK, then you can live with your father." BABY RAPTOR: "No! He beats me too!" JUDGE: "Well you have to live with someone. Who do you want to live with?" BABY RAPTOR: "I want to live with my Aunt Bertha in Toronto." JUDGE: "Is there any chance she'll beat you also?" BABY RAPTOR: "No sir. The Toronto Raptors don't beat anybody."
What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? a lickalotapus.
Yo mama so old she ran track with the dinosaurs.
Q: What's the nickname for someone who put their right hand in the mouth of a T-Rex? A: Lefty.
Yo mommas so stupid when she licked a dog she said meow.
What do a walrus and Tupperware have in common? They both like a tight seal.
"Why cant you play cards in the jungle?" "Because theres to many cheetahs."
Scientists believe that a giant meteor killed off the dinosaurs. This is true, if you can consider Chuck Norris to be a giant meteor.
A man was robbing a house in the middle of the night. All of a sudden, he heard a parrot cry out. "Jesus is gonna get you." The robber ignored it, and takes the TV. Again, the parrot cries out. "Jesus is gonna get you." The robber started to get a little worried. "What's your name, birdie?" "Moses." "What dumbass named you Moses?" "The same dumbass who called his rottweiler Jesus."