Joke #1492

What do you call a gay dinosaur?…… Mega-sore-ass.
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has 67.85 % from 55 votes. More jokes about: animal, dinosaur

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Mama Raptor and Papa Raptor were in court getting a divorce and the judge offered Baby Raptor a choice of which parent to live with. JUDGE: "Do you want to live with your mother?" BABY RAPTOR: "No! She beats me." JUDGE: "OK, then you can live with your father." BABY RAPTOR: "No! He beats me too!" JUDGE: "Well you have to live with someone. Who do you want to live with?" BABY RAPTOR: "I want to live with my Aunt Bertha in Toronto." JUDGE: "Is there any chance she'll beat you also?" BABY RAPTOR: "No sir. The Toronto Raptors don't beat anybody."
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has 66.17 % from 59 votes. More jokes about: animal, baby, dinosaur
What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? a lickalotapus.
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has 38.60 % from 73 votes. More jokes about: animal, dinosaur, dirty, lesbian
A woman stopped by our customer-service desk and asked me for a copy of the book that has Jesus in it. After much back-and-forth, I determined that she wanted the Bible. After searching for a particular book on dinosaurs in the science section without luck, a customer looked to me for help. She showed me a piece of paper with the title written on it: Thesaurus.
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has 63.22 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: bible, christian, customer service, dinosaur, stupid
Q: What do you call cattle with a sense of humor? A: Laughing stock.
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has 52.18 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: animal
What do you call a lesbian dinosaur A lickalotopis
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has 39.47 % from 92 votes. More jokes about: dinosaur, dirty, lesbian
What is the last thing to go through a bug's mind when it hits your windshield? It's ass.
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has 52.93 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: animal, disgusting
Ronnie goes to the auction. He notices a parrot that was on auction. Ronnie decides to bid for it and so Ronnie starts off with 50 Dollars. Auctioneer: 50 Dollars Voice: 100 Dollars Ronnie: 200 Dollars Voice: 300 Dollars Ronnie: 400 Dollars Voice: 750 Dollars Ronnie: 800 Dollars Auctioneer 800 going once, twice and the parrot is sold. Ronnie to the Auctioneer "I hope this Parrot can speak as I have spent a lot of money on it." Auctioneer Laughing: "Who do you think was Bidding against you.
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has 77.02 % from 281 votes. More jokes about: animal, money, parrot
A man who is concerned about his wife cheating on him wants to catch her in the act. He doesn’t have enough money to hire a PI, so he goes to a pet shop. There he asks the clerk if he has a parrot for sale. The clerk shows him the last parrot he has: “This is the last parrot I have for sale. He doesn’t have any legs, but he is very smart.” The man asks, “If he doesn’t have any legs, how does he stay on the perch?” “He holds on with his dick.” the clerk answered. The man asks ” How much?” “Since he doesn’t have any legs, I’ll sell him to you for fifty bucks.” The suspicious man purchases the talking bird and takes him home. He sets up the cage in his bedroom where he can see everything; he then instructs the parrot to watch what ever goes on in the room and inform him when he gets home from work. So the next morning he leaves for work and his wife stays home, as usual. When the man gets home from work, as his wife is cooking supper, he asks the parrot to tell him what went on during the day. The parrot begins, “At eight o’clock this morning the mailman came….” Interrupting the man asks, “Yeah and what happened?” “he came in the house…” Furiously, the man asked “And then” “…and then he came into the bedroom…” Astounded the man impatiently asks, “What happened next?” “He began to take off his clothes and she hers…” “What happened after that!” The parrot then replied, “I don’t know I sprung a boner and fell off!”
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has 73.37 % from 94 votes. More jokes about: animal, parrot, wife, work
Yo mama is so fat she made all the dinosaurs extinct.
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has 54.97 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: dinosaur, fat, Yo mama
A meteor did not kill the dinosaurs, Chuck Norris just went on a hunting trip.
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has 56.05 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, dinosaur, hunting