What do you call a gay dinosaur?…… Mega-sore-ass.
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Mama Raptor and Papa Raptor were in court getting a divorce and the judge offered Baby Raptor a choice of which parent to live with.
JUDGE: "Do you want to live with your mother?"
BABY RAPTOR: "No! She beats me."
JUDGE: "OK, then you can live with your father."
BABY RAPTOR: "No! He beats me too!"
JUDGE: "Well you have to live with someone. Who do you want to live with?"
BABY RAPTOR: "I want to live with my Aunt Bertha in Toronto."
JUDGE: "Is there any chance she'll beat you also?"
BABY RAPTOR: "No sir. The Toronto Raptors don't beat anybody."
What do you call a lesbian dinosaur?
a lickalotapus.
"Name?"
"Abdul Aziz."
"Sex?"
"Three to five times a day."
"No, no... I mean male or female?"
"Yes, male, female, sometimes camel."
"Holy cow!"
"Yes, cow, sheep, animals in general."
"But isn't that hostile?"
"Horse style, doggy style, any style!"
"Oh dear!"
"No, no! Deer run too fast..."
Dinosaurs once crossed Chuck Norris.
Once.
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What's wet and wiggly and says how do you do sixteen times?
Two octopuses shaking hands.
Q: Why did dinosaurs have sex under water?
A: You try to keep five hundred pounds of pussy wet!
Q: What do you call a snake who works for the government?
A: A civil serpent.
Q: What do women and cats have in common?
A: Pussy farts.
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What kind of cows do you find in Alaska?
Eski-moos.
Chuck Norris stopped playing golf after that unfortunate incident with the dinosaurs.
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