Why do Mexicans eat beans for dinner? So they can take bubble baths.
Q: What's the best part about sex with 28-year-olds? A: There are twenty of them.
Q: What's the slowest thing on 80 wheels? A: A Mexican funeral with only two sets of jumper cables.
Q: What is the difference between baby and knitting? A: Knitting is weaved by two needles and one ball, but the baby has been made with one needle and two balls!
Who may open the door without using hands, nor legs? An invalid.
One step forward, 12 floors down.
They say that if I don't support transgender rights I'm on the wrong side of history. At least I'm on the right side of the firing squad.
A doctor from the inner city was conversing with an old friend from med school at a cafe when he said, "Man, can I tell you something?" His friend nods. "Sure." "Okay, so the other day I had this one really hot, foreign patient, and I haven't been able to stop thinking about her since..." He goes on to tell his friend everything about her, from her long blond hair and ability to speak fluent French, to her shimmering blue eyes and soft skin. His friend seemed more disgusted with each passing moment. "Dude, that is not cool." The doctor, indignant, defended himself. "What's wrong with that? Lots of doctors are attracted to their patients." His friend simply shook his head and replied, "Maybe, but I guarantee you none of those doctors were pediatricians..."
What's the difference between a dead baby and a Styrofoam cup? A dead baby doesn't harm the atmosphere when you burn it.
Why do orphans like playing tennis? Because it's the only love they get.