A sandwich walks into a bar. The barman says ''Sorry we don't serve food in here''
Do you know the joke of "no me neither"? No. Me neither.
I took a day off from work to play golf. I was on the fourth hole, when I discovered a small frog sitting on the green. I paid it no attention until I heard, "Ribbit. 9-iron." That's curious, I thought, but decided to trust the frog. I pulled out a 9-iron and sunk a hole-in-one. Amazed, I picked up the frog and asked where we should go next. "Ribbit. Vegas." We went to Vegas, and I asked the frog what we should do first. "Ribbit. Roulette." We went up to the roulette table, and I won big. I took my earnings and got the best room in the hotel. I asked the frog if there was anything I could do to repay it. "Ribbit. Kiss me." I figured, what the hell, and I kissed the frog. It turned into a 15-year-old girl. That's how she ended up in my room, your Honor, and if I'm lying, my name's not R. Kelly. Tweet Share
Q:Doctor, Doctor I keep thinking I'm the school bell. A: Take These tablets and if they don't work give me a ring in the morning.
Q:Did you hear the joke about the rope? A:Just skip it.
The fastest dialog in the world: (WC door is opening) Man inside: Heyyy! Man outside: Sorryyy!
I hate it when you offer someone a sincere compliment about their mustache, and suddenly she is not your friend anymore...
Two politician are having lunch together, all of a sudden one stood up and shouted, "Your lying." The other replied, "I know but just hear me out."
How do you know which one is your boss from a crowd of 500 people? You say: “My boss is a stupidest asshole!”
Q: Wanna hear a joke? A: Women's Rights.