Joke #3684

Resolving to surprise her husband, an executive's wife stopped by his office. When she opened the door, she found him with his secretary sitting in his lap. Without hesitating, he dictated, "...and in conclusion, gentlemen, budget cuts or no budget cuts, I cannot continue to operate this office with just one chair."
Vote: has 62.19 % from 46 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

Me: Can I call an officer a pussy? Cop: No. Me: Can I call a pussy 'officer?' Cop: I guess you could... Me: Goodnight, officer
Vote: has 62.88 % from 72 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: cop, dirty
A dick has a sad life. His hair's a mess, his family is nuts, his neighbor's an asshole, his bestfriend's a pussy, and his owner beats him.
Vote: has 86.11 % from 1951 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty, family, life, sex
A guy goes to the store to buy condoms. "Do you want a bag?", the cashier asks. "No", the guy says, "She's not that ugly."
Vote: has 62.75 % from 93 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty, ugly
A man gets the words 'I love you' tattoed to his penis. He goes home and shows his wife. His wife says, "Don't try to put words into my mouth!"
Vote: has 81.16 % from 1050 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: communication, dirty, love, wife
A man and wife were making love. When thay saw there 8 year old son at the door crying the dad started laughing and the boy ran away. Mom said "You better fix this now." The dad couldn't find the boy anywhere unwell he hurd a loud noise conning from grandma's room so he opened up the door and there was the boy putting his "wood" to grandma. The dad screamed "What the fuck." The boy said "It aims so funny when it's your mom is it."
Vote: has 64.76 % from 29 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dad, dirty, family, kids, sex
Three men are sitting at a campfire telling stories about their great endeavors. The first man talked about how to sucked out the venom of a snake and sucked it up with 50 degree alcohol. The second man called it a circus trick as he has gotten 3 gunshots towards the chest and he but the guns in half. They looked at the third guy wanting to hear his story. Only to see him stroking his cock with the glowing hot coals.
Vote: has 48.78 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: alcohol, dirty, life, men
A little boy came home from school and his homework assignment was to find out what the difference was between hypothetically and realistically,so he asked his dad. His dad said, "Well, go ask your mom if she would sleep with the mail man for $1,000,000." He went and asked and came back and said, "She said yes". "Well", said the dad, "Go ask your sister the same question." He did and came back and said, "She said yes." And the dad said, "Now go ask your brother the same thing." He did and came back and said, "He said yes too!" And the dad said, "Well hypothetically we're sitting on three million dollars, realistically we're living with 2 whores and a fag!"
Vote: has 85.24 % from 561 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty
Your mama is so stupid, when she lost her dildo she called the cops to look for it.
Vote: has 47.62 % from 25 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: cop, dirty, sex, stupid, Yo mama
A man is lying on the beach, sun bathing, wearing nothing but a cap over his dick. An ugly woman is passing and remarks "If you were a gentleman, you would lift your hat for a lady ..." He replies "If you were any sort of lady, the hat would lift itself!"
Vote: has 86.34 % from 923 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty
An ugly bloke walks into a pub with a huge grin on his face. "What are you so happy about ?" asks the landlord. "Well, I live by the railway and on my way home last night I noticed a woman tied to the tracks. I cut her free and we shagged all night !" "Did you get a blow job ?" asks the landlord. "No ..." he says, "I never found the head."
Vote: has 71.05 % from 94 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty