Law of Cat Composition
A cat is composed of Matter + Anti-Matter + It Doesn't Matter.
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A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are stuck on top of a cliff.
A magical bird flies to them and tells them that each one of them can jump off the cliff and wish to be one thing to fly away on.
They will become that thing and can escape from their arduous situation.
The redhead goes first.
She jumps and says "eagle!".
She turns into an eagle and flies away.
The brunette jumps off and says,"hawk!" she turns into a hawk and flies away.
The blonde takes a running start, trips on a rock as she nears the edge. "Oh crap!" she yells.
What happened to the cannibal lion?
He had to swallow his pride!
‘I spilled spot remover on my dog.
Now he’s gone.’
Steven Wright
What do you call an easy-going rabbit?
Hoppy-go-lucky.
What animals do you bring to bed?
Your calves.
Q: Did you hear about the dyslexic, agnostic insomniac?
A: He stayed up all night wondering if there was a dog.
Q: What do you call a cow that's had an abortion?
A: De-calf-i-nated.
What do you call a bull that runs into a threshing machine?
Hamburger.
What do you call a man with a rabbit up his jumper?
Warren.