Joke #3708

Law of Cat Composition A cat is composed of Matter + Anti-Matter + It Doesn't Matter.
Vote: has 48.02 % from 11 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

What's a moo hoo for a stuffed steer? A full bull.
Vote: has 49.51 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal
My cat can talk. I asked her what two minus two was and she said nothing.
Vote: has 21.85 % from 9 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal
A man absolutely hated his wife's cat and decided to get rid of him one day by driving him 20 blocks from his home and leaving him at the park. As he was getting home, the cat was walking up the driveway. The next day he decided to drive the cat 40 blocks away. He put the beast out and headed home. Driving back up his driveway, there was the cat! He kept taking the cat further and further and the cat would always beat him home. At last he decided to drive a few miles away, turn right, then left, past the bridge, then right again and another right until he reached what he thought was a safe distance from his home and left the cat there. Hours later the man calls home to his wife: "Jen, is the cat there?" "Yes", the wife answers, "why do you ask?" Frustrated, the man answered, "Put that son of a bitch on the phone, I'm lost and need directions!"
Vote: has 79.48 % from 83 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal
Q. What did the elephant say to the naked man? A. "How do you breathe through something so small?"
Vote: has 50.70 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal
Animal testing is a terrible idea; they get all nervous and give the wrong answers.
Vote: has 27.32 % from 5 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal
What do you get if you cross a cat with a gorilla? An animal that puts you out at night.
Vote: has 24.92 % from 8 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal
Chuck Norris Killed Medusa with a round house Kick.
Vote: has 64.78 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, death
A magician worked on a cruise ship. The audience was different each week so the magician did the same tricks over and over again. There was only one problem: the captain's parrot saw the shows each week and began to understand how the magician did every trick.  Once he understood, he started shouting in the middle of the show, "Look, it's not the same hat!" or, "Look, he's hiding the flowers under the table!" or "Hey, why are all the cards the ace of spades?"  The magician was furious but couldn't do anything. It was, after all, the captain's parrot.  Then one stormy night on the Pacific, the ship unfortunately sank, drowning almost all who were on board. The magician luckily found himself on a piece of wood floating in the middle of the sea, as fate would have it... with the parrot. They stared at each other with hatred, but did not utter a word. This went on for a day... and then 2 days and then 3 days. Finally on the 4th day, the parrot could not hold back any longer and said... "OK, I give up. Where's the fucking ship?"
Vote: has 77.74 % from 24 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, travel
What's a rabbits favorite song? "Hoppy Birthday to You."
Vote: has 49.51 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, music
Rabbit: "I got kicked out of my cage for not paying the rent. My wife walked out and took our twenty-nine bunnies with her. I m all out of carrots. What should I do?" Friend: "Don't worry; be hoppy!"
Vote: has 60.16 % from 12 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, food, wife