What color socks do bears wear?
(They don't wear socks, they have bear feet!)
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A Bosnian catches a goldfish.
The goldfish says: "Let me go and I will grant you one wish."
The Bosnian says: "No way, I'll take you to the pawn shop – gold is gold."
Why was the little bear so spoiled?
Because its mother panda d to its every whim.
A carpet layer had just finished installing carpet for a lady.
He stepped out for a smoke, only to realize he'd lost his cigarettes.
In the middle of the room, under the carpet, was a bump.
''No sense pulling up the entire floor for one pack of smokes,'' he said to himself.
He proceeded to get out his hammer and flattened the hump.
As he was cleaning up, the lady came in.
''Here,'' she said, handling him his pack of cigarettes. ''I found them in the hallway.''
''Now,'' she said, ''if only I could find my parakeet.''
What did the flower say to be the bee?
"Buzz off you stupid ugly horny cunt."
Vote:
Q: What is the difference between a rooster and a whore?
A: The rooster goes cock doodle do and the whore goes any cock do!
Yo mama so ugly that when she delivered a little baby after birth the baby saw mum and screamed "It's a gorilla!".
Will I ever be able to race my horse again the owner asked the vet.
The vet replied, "You certainly will, and you ll probably beat her too!"
Q: Why did the lion brake up with his girlfriend?
A: Cuz she was a CHEETAH!
Vote:
Q: Why don't they let Blondes swim in the ocean?
A: Because they can't get the smell out of the tuna.