Joke #3760

A mink in the wardrobe often leads to a wolf at the door.
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has 46.10 % from 8 votes. More jokes about: money

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What did the rabbit bride get on her wedding day? A forty-carrot wedding ring.
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has 68.45 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: animal, money, wedding
An actuary priced an automobile ‘fire and theft’ policy with an extremely low premium. When asked why it was so cheap, he said, ‘Who’d steal a burnt car?’
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has 22.18 % from 6 votes. More jokes about: money
One reason the Services have trouble operating jointly is that they don’t speak the same language. For example, if you told Navy personnel to “secure a building,” they would turn off the lights and lock the doors. Army personnel would occupy the building so no one could enter. Marines would assault the building, capture it, and defend it with suppressive fire and close combat. The Air Force, on the other hand, would take out a three-year lease with an option to buy.
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has 57.64 % from 65 votes. More jokes about: air force, death, military, money, navy
Dad, would you like to save some money? I certainly would, son. Any suggestions? Sure. Why not buy me a bike, then I won't wear my shoes out so fast.
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has 26.16 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: dad, money
A man is dining in a fancy restaurant and there is a gorgeous redhead sitting at the next table. He has been checking her out since he sat down, but lacks the nerve to talk with her. Suddenly, she sneezes and her glass eye comes flying out of its socket towards the man. He reflexively reaches out, grabs it out of the air, and hands it back. "Oh my, I am so sorry," the woman says as she pops her eye back in place. "Let me buy your dinner to make it up to you," she says. They enjoy a wonderful dinner together, and afterwards the theater followed by drinks. They talk, they laugh, she shares her deepest dreams and he shares his. She listens. After paying for everything, she asks him if he would like to come to her place for a nightcap ......... and stay for breakfast. The next morning, she cooks a gourmet meal with all the trimmings. The guy is amazed!! Everything had been SO incredible!!!! "You know," he said, "you are the perfect woman. Are you this nice to every guy you meet?". "No," she replies, "You just happened to catch my eye."
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has 67.33 % from 107 votes. More jokes about: ginger, life, money, women
Think nobody knows you’re alive? Try missing a payment.
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has 24.92 % from 8 votes. More jokes about: money
A mugger stops a guy on the street at gunpoint. "Give me all your money", he says. The muggee isindignant. "You can't do this," he yells. "I'm anIRS agent." "In that case," says the mugger, "give me all MY money."
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has 72.63 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: accountant, money, work
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has 49.61 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: communication, mean, money, technology, work
A young accountant, straight out of uni, applies for a job advertised in the Sydney Morning Herald. He is interviewed by the owner of a small business who has built it up from scratch. "I need someone with an accounting degree," says the man, "but mainly I'm looking for someone to do my worrying for me." "How do you mean?" says the accountant. "I have lots of things to worry about, but I want someone else to worry about money matters." "OK," says the accountant. "How much are you offering?" "You can start on seventy-five thousand," says the owner. "Seventy-five thousand dollars. How can a business like this afford to pay so much?" "That," says the man, "is your first worry."
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has 76.51 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: accountant, business, graduation, money, work
I like black people . . . . . I used to have some black friends 'till my dad sold them!
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has 54.15 % from 202 votes. More jokes about: black people, dad, money