A businessman is invited for an audience with the Pope but finds it clashes with a meeting he has with Bill Gates.
The businessman asks his secretary which appointment he should go to.
‘Definitely the Pope,’ replies the secretary.
‘He’ll only expect you to kiss his hand.’
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Why didn’t the internet get any e-mail?
Because his e-dog kept chasing the e-postman.
What's an extroverted IT professional?
One who looks at your shoes while he's talking to you, instead of his own.
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A life? Cool… Where can I download one of those?
A computer programmer happens across a frog in the road.
The frog pipes up, "I'm really a beautiful princess and if you kiss me, I'll stay with you for a week".
The programmer shrugs his shoulders and puts the frog in his pocket.
A few minutes later, the frog says "OK, OK, if you kiss me, I'll give you great sex for a week".
The programmer nods and puts the frog back in his pocket.
A few minutes later, "Turn me back into a princess and I'll give you great sex for a whole year!"
The programmer smiles and walks on.
Finally, the frog says, "What's wrong with you? I've promised you great sex for a year from a beautiful princess and you won't even kiss a frog?"
"I'm a programmer," he replies.
"I don't have time for sex.But a talking frog is pretty neat."
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The biggest SEO problem with trampoline websites is the high user bounce rate!
What goes ‘choo choo choo’ while online?
Thomas the search engine.
What is a cursor?
Someone having computer problems.
What do you get if you cross a computer with a herb?
A thyme machine.
What do you get if you cross a computer and a policeman?
PC Plod.
Q: How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None, that's a hardware problem.
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