What do computers do when they get hungry?
They eat chips!
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The code that is the hardest to debug is the code that you know cannot possibly be wrong.
I had a programming problem and decided to use regular expressions to solve it.
Now I have two problems.
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When you get to the point where you really understand your computer, it’s probably obsolete.
A man goes inside a pet shop and starts to move around the cages to scout the pets.
He sees a monkey with a price of 5000$ and goes to the merchant to ask for details.
Hey mister, the monkey…what does it know to worth that much money?
Well, it knows Windows 95, 98, 2000, and also knows Word, C++, Visual Basic and last but not least, it knows how to play computer games.
- Good monkey, it's worth the money.
He goes and finds another monkey with a price of 10000$ and again he will ask the merchant.
"What does this monkey know?"
"It knows Linux, Unix, Corel and Autocad."
"Nice, even I don't know those things."
On a last scout run he finds another monkey just sitting there with a price 20000$.
The story repeats, and he goes with a lack of confidence to ask the merchant for details.
"And what does this monkey do for that ridiculous amount of money?"
"I never saw her doing anything, but the other two call her Project Manager!"
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Before Instagram, I used to waste so much time sitting around having to imagine what my friends' food looked like.
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A TV can insult your intelligence, but nothing rubs it in like a computer.
What does the informatics teacher scream when he’s drowning? - F1, F1, F1...
What does a network administrator say when he gets back to home from work ?
There’s no place like 127.0.0.1!
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Me: Siri, why am I alone?
Siri: *opens front facing camera*