When you get to the point where you really understand your computer, it’s probably obsolete.
UNIX is basically a simple operating system, but you have to be a genius to understand the simplicity.
What did the computer do at lunchtime? Had a byte!
Chuck Norris invented the internet so that he could reach his enemies, preferably ninjas.
What do computers eat when they get hungry? "Chips."
Your Momma is so fat, she takes her picture with Google Earth.
"Knock, knock.Who's there?" very long pause... "Java."
The MCI virus: Every three minutes it reminds you that you're paying too much for the AT&T virus. Bill Clinton virus: This virus mutates from region to region and we're not exactly sure what it does. Bill Clinton virus: Promises to give equal time to all processes: 50% to poor, slow processes; 50% to middle-class processes, and 50% to rich ones. This virus protests your computer's involvement in other computer's affairs, even though it has been having one of its own for 12 years. Congressional Virus: Overdraws your computer. Congressional Virus: The computer locks up, screen splits erratically with a message appearing on each half blaming the other side for the problem.
Q: What's the Internet's favorite animal? A: The lynx.
Baby, if you were an iPhone 6, I would tap you all day!
According to Apple what is the leading cause of iphone 6 overheating? Downloading images of Candice Swanepoel.