A life? Cool… Where can I download one of those?
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Why did the boy mouse like the girl mouse?
They just seemed to click.
Chuck Norris can open PDF files with Microsoft Excel.
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Customer: “I can’t seem to connect to the Internet.”
Tech Support: “Ah, right. What operating system are you running?”
Customer: “Netscape.”
Tech Support: “No, what version of Windows are you using?”
Customer: “Uhhh…Hewlett Packard?”
Tech Support: “No, Right click on ‘My Computer,’ and select properties on the menu.”
Customer: “Your computer? It’s my computer!”
Programmers: See one warning, fixes warning. Compiles...
See two errors, fixes errors. Compiles...
See 83 errors, pitches computer.
Chuck doesn't have e-mail, he has HE-mail.
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Programming is like sex.
One mistake and you have to support it for the rest of your life.
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To the optimist, the glass is half-full.
To the pessimist, the glass is half-empty.
To the IT professional, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.
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Bad command or file name.
Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay!
What does the informatics teacher scream when he’s drowning? - F1, F1, F1...