The numeric keypad only goes up to six.
Q: What did the dentist say to the computer? A: This won't hurt a byte
Your mama so stupid she bought tickets to Xbox Live.
What's an extroverted IT professional? One who looks at your shoes while he's talking to you, instead of his own.
Outgoing e-mails have tobacco stains on them.
What do computers do when they get hungry? They eat chips!
Steve Jobs was an amazing man. He will live in my hard drive forever!
If at first you don't succeed, call it version 1.0.
Bill Gates is at the beach when he discovers a bottle, he opens it and a Genie appears. The Genie says, "I have been trapped for 1000 years. As a reward you can make a wish." Gates thinks about it as he carries the bottle back to his beach cottage. Once there, he goes to a bookshelf, pulls out an atlas and turns to a map of the Middle East. This area has seen conflict and suffering for hundreds of years. What I wish for is peace in the Middle East. The Genie replies, "I don't know I can do a lot, but this? Don't you have another wish?" Bill Gates thinks and finally says, OK. The whole world hates Microsoft because we have conquered the software market and because Windows still crashes. I wish you would make everybody love us. The Genie says, "Let me see that map again."
Q: What did Data find when he went into the bathroom stall? A: Captain's log.
If you put a million monkeys at a million keyboards, one of them will eventually write a Java program. The rest of them will write Perl programs.