Bad command or file name.
Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay!
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Q: What did Data find when he went into the bathroom stall?
A: Captain's log.
Chuck Norris gave Black Ops a thumbs up and people at Microsoft a roundhouse kick in the face. Suck it Microsoft.
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Chuck Norris can open Microsoft Windows when he needs fresh air.
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Satan greets him: "Welcome Mr. Gates, we've been waiting for you.
This will be your home for all eternity.
You've been selfish, greedy and a big liar all your life.
Now, since you've got me in a good mood, I'll be generous and give you a choice of three places in which you'll be locked up forever.
Satan takes Bill to a huge lake of fire in which millions of poor souls are tormented and tortured.
He then takes him to a massive coliseum where thousands of people are chased about and devoured by starving lions.
Finally, he takes Bill to a tiny room in which there is a bottle of the finest wine sitting on a table.
To Bill's delight, he sees a PC in the corner. Without hesitation, Bill says "I'll take this option."
"Fine," says Satan, allowing Bill to enter the room. Satan locks the room after Bill.
As he turns around, he bumps into Lucifer.
"That was Bill Gates!" cried Lucifer.
"Why did you give him the best place of all!"
"That's what everyone thinks" snickered Satan.
"The bottle has a hole in it!"
"What about the PC?"
"It's got Windows 95!" laughed Satan.
"And it's missing three keys,"
"Which three?"
"Control, Alt and Delete."
Q: My shift keys have little arrows on them. Does that mean the *real* shift keys are located above them, and these keys are just little signs to point them out?
A: Nope, they're the Real McCoy.
The little arrows mean "up", as in "look up at the screen".
Your keyboard is telling you to learn to touch type and quit staring at your fingers.
CEO frequently overheard mumbling, "Eeny, meeny, miney, moe."
Windows XP shutdown screen reads, "It is Now Safe to Start Looking for Work."
Company softball team downsized to chess team.
Company president now driving a Hyundai.
Giant yard sale in front of corporate headquarters.