Joke #4023

Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay!
Vote: has 10.69 % from 72 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: IT

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

To the optimist, the glass is half-full. To the pessimist, the glass is half-empty. To the IT professional, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.
Vote: has 81.55 % from 292 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: IT, programmer
Bill Gates, Andy Grove, and Jerry Sanders (CEOs of MicroSoft, Intel, and AMD) were in a high-powered business meeting. During the serious, tense discussion, a beeping noise suddenly is emitted from where Bill is sitting. Bill says, “Oh, that’s my beeper. Gentlemen, excuse me, I need to take this call.” So Bill lifts his wristwatch to his ear and begins talking into the end of his tie. After completing this call, he notices the others are staring at him. Bill explains, “Oh, this is my new emergency communication system. I have an earpiece built into my watch and a microphone sewn into the end of my tie. That way I can take a call anywhere.” The others nod and the meeting continues. Five minutes later, the discussion is again interrupted when Andy starts beeping. He states, “Excuse me gentlemen, this must be an important call.” So Andy taps his earlobe and begins talking into thin air. When he completes his call, he notices the others staring at him and explains, “I also have an emergency communication system. But my earpiece is actually implanted in my earlobe, and the microphone is actually embedded in this fake tooth.” The others nod, and the meeting continues. Five minutes later, the discussion is again interrupted when Jerry emits a thunderous fart. He looks up at the others staring at him and says, “Somebody get me a piece of paper… I’m receiving a FAX."
Vote: has 65.86 % from 48 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: business, celebrity, fart, IT, phone
God called a meeting of George Bush, Tony Blair and Bill Gates. ‘I’ve given you all the tools you needed to make a better world,’ says God. ‘But you’ve failed and I’m ending the world in two weeks.’ Bush goes on TV and says, ‘I have good news and bad news. The good news is that God exists. The bad news is that the world will end in two weeks.’ Tony Blair says, ‘I have bad news and really bad news. The bad news is that God is really annoyed. The really bad news is he’s going to destroy us.’ Bill Gates calls his workers together and says, ‘I have good news and great news. The good news is that God thinks I’m one of the three most powerful people in the world. The great news is that we don’t have to fix the bugs in the new Windows package.’
Vote: has 46.54 % from 13 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: IT
Error, no keyboard. Press F1 to continue.
Vote: has 80.76 % from 198 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: IT
With searching comes loss And the presence of absence: ‘My Novel’ not found.
Vote: has 13.67 % from 29 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: IT
What do you call a computer that takes 15 minutes to start, freezes if you try to do more than one thing at a time, crashes regularly and causes you to swear under your breath throughout the day? Cutting edge.
Vote: has 52.18 % from 15 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: IT
The computer programmer to his son: "Here, I brought you a new basketball." Son: "Thank you, daddy, but where is the user's guide?"
Vote: has 54.66 % from 27 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: computer, IT, programmer, sport
Two geeks are talking over lunch. The first guy says, "You wouldn't believe what happened this morning. A girl rode up to me on her bike, took off all her clothes, and said 'Take whatever you want!' … So I took the bike" The second guy says, "Good choice, her clothes probably wouldn't have fit you."
Vote: has 79.50 % from 118 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: geek, IT
Q: What did the dentist say to the computer? A: This won't hurt a byte
Vote: has 56.86 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: computer, dentist, geek, IT
How many Microsoft programmers does it take to start the November 5th bonfire? Zero Microsoft declares darkness to be a new standard.
Vote: has 66.45 % from 19 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: IT, programmer, technology