There are no weapons of mass destruction.
Just Chuck Norris.
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Voldemort refers to Chuck Norris as "You Know Who."
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In India, cows wait until Chuck Norris crosses the street.
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When Chuck Norris played the card game War with a friend, France surrendered.
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Chuck Norris once replied to a 'no-reply' mail, and got the answer he wanted.
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Lehman Brothers owed Chuck Norris a fiver.
When he asked for payback, well, you know the rest.
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Chuck Norris is the only human being to display the Heisenberg uncertainty principle -- you can never know both exactly where and how quickly he will roundhouse-kick you in the face.
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Santa Clause, The Easter Bunny, and the Tooth Fairy were all real at one time... then they met Chuck.
There can only be 1 living legend.
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Chuck Norris once round house kicked a fat kid in the stomach and his foot print stayed their until the kid lost the weight.
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Chuck Norris tells clocks what time it is.
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There is no such thing as global warming.
Chuck Norris was cold, so he turned the sun up.
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