There are no weapons of mass destruction. Just Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris built Rome with a box of scraps.
Chuck Norris can tie your hands behind your back with both hands tied behind his back.
Chuck Norris once soaked his beard in carbonated water. The result is now sold as Red Bull.
Big Foot discovered Chuck Norris and hid in the forest.
Chuck Norris does not smile. \r\nHe flexes his teeth.
Chuck Norris sleeps with every woman on the planet once a month... and they bleed for a week.
Chuck Norris once threw out the first pitch at a NASCAR race.
Chuck Norris was once so famished, he ate Turkey. The country there now is only an impostor.
Chuck Norris doesn't have an Ipod, he has an Ifist.
The light at the end of the tunnel is actually Chuck Norris holding a flashlight.