Electricity pays Chuck Norris to light up his house.
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Stevie Wonder was the last person to stare Chuck Norris directly in the eyes...
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Chuck Norris does not buy ground beef, he just takes a whole cow, runs it through his beard, and fully cooked hamburgers come out.
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Remember the Leia scene from The Last Jedi?
That wasn't the force, it was Chuck Norris resurrecting Carrie Fischer.
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If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he always says, "Two seconds 'till."
After you ask, "Two seconds 'til what?" he roundhouse kicks you in the face.
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Chuck Norris doesn't tell lies. He changes facts.
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Many years ago Chuck Norris and a brown bear had a fight.
The loser had to go live in the north pole.
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Chuck Norris steps into the confession booth.
The Priests confess his sins.
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Chuck Norris never wet his bed as a child.
The bed went itself out of fear.
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Chuck Norris never has a deja vu.
No scene would be that stupid to appear in front of the man twice.
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Willy Wonka gave an everlasting gobstopper to Chuck Norris.
The flavor lasted 2.3 seconds.
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