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A life? Cool… Where can I download one of those?
Q: How can you tell a blonde's been using the computer?
A: There's white-out all over the screen.
You know, I have Google+, Facebook, Twitter, Skype accounts...
Man, and do you have life?
OMG, No! Could you send me a link?
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A blonde girl enters a store that sells curtains.
She tells the salesman, “I would like to buy a pink curtain in the size of my computer screen.”
The surprised salesman replies, “But, madam, computers do not have curtains.”
And the blonde said, “Helloooo…. I’ve got Windows!”
Q: Why did the computer go to the dentist?
A: Because it had Bluetooth.
Chuck Norris can open PDF files with Microsoft Excel.
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What do you call a computer that takes 15 minutes to start, freezes if you try to do more than one thing at a time, crashes regularly and causes you to swear under your breath throughout the day?
Cutting edge.
When Nasa first began sending astronauts into space, they were confronted by a small problem.
Their standard ballpoint pens would not work in space.
They spent a decade and twelve million dollars designing a pen that would work below three hundred degrees, in space, and on glass.
Russia used a pencil.
Q: My shift keys have little arrows on them. Does that mean the *real* shift keys are located above them, and these keys are just little signs to point them out?
A: Nope, they're the Real McCoy.
The little arrows mean "up", as in "look up at the screen".
Your keyboard is telling you to learn to touch type and quit staring at your fingers.
Once upon a time, a computer programmer drowned at sea.
Many were on the beach and heard him cry out, “F1! F1!”, but no one understood.
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