Someday, the people who know how to use computers will rule over those who don’t.
And there will be a special name for them – secretaries.
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3 Database SQL walked into a NoSQL bar.
A little while later they walked out because they couldn't find a table.
Virus "Windows" found: Delete, Repair, Next?
Murphy's Laws of Computing
1. When computing, whatever happens, behave as though you meant it to happen.
2. When you get to the point where you really understand your computer, it's probably obsolete.
3. The first place to look for information is in the section of the manual where you least expect to find it.
4. When the going gets tough, upgrade.
5. For every action, there is an equal and opposite malfunction.
6. To err is human.. to blame your computer for your mistakes is even more human, it is downright natural.
7. He who laughs last probably made a back-up.
8. If at first you do not succeed, blame your computer.
9. A complex system that does not work is invariably found to have evolved from a simpler system that worked just fine.
10. The number one cause of computer problems is computer solutions.
11. A computer program will always do what you tell it to do, but rarely what you want to do.
Vote:
Yo mama's so fat when she made a YouTube account the entire network crashed.
How many electricians does it take to change a light bulb?
Three.
One to change it, and two to complain about how bad GE's customer support is.
Why is Apple offering a free case for all iPhone 6 buyers?
It doesn't help with reception, but protects the iPhone when you throw it against the wall after dropping another call!
James Bond got this email from a friend:
CanYouPleaseFixTheSpaceBarOnMyKeyboard?
A project manager, a computer programmer and a computer operator are driving down the road when the car they are in gets a flat tire.
The three men try to solve the problem.
The project manager said: "Let's catch a cab and in ten minutes we'll reach our destination."
The computer programmer said: "We have here the driver's guide.
I can easily replace the flat tire and continue our drive."
The computer operator said: "First of all, let's turn off the engine and turn it on again.
Maybe it will fix the problem."
Suddenly a Microsoft software engineer passed by and said: "Try to close all windows, get off the car, and then get in and try again."