What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball?
Juan on Juan.
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Golfer: "Well, I have never played this badly before!"
Caddy: "I didn't realize you had played before, sir!"
Golfer: The doctor says I can't play golf.
Caddy: O! So, he too has played with you?
Do people who run know that we're not food anymore?
Q: What's the difference between an NFL player and an elevator?
A: The elevator can raise a child.
Twenty feet below sea level, a diver notices another guy at the same depth with no scuba gear.
The diver goes down another 10 feet, and the guy joins him a minute later.
The diver goes below 15 more feet, and a minute later, the same guy joins him.
The diver takes out a waterproof pad and pencil and writes, "How are you able to stay this deep without equipment?"
The guy takes the pencil and pad and writes, "I'm drowning, you moron!"
If the Jacksonville Jaguars are known as the "Jags" and the Tampa Bay Buccaneers are known as the "Bucs," what does that make the Tennessee Titans?
Why didn't the cannibal eat Mike Tyson?
He thought he would give him a paunch!
Vote:
Son: "What's love juice daddy?"
Me: "It's what 2 people make when they're having exciting sex. Anyway? What are you watching?"
Son: "Wimbledon."
What would you get if you crossed a grizzly with the world's greatest basketball player?
Bear Jordan.
A regular Friday night poker game was still going strong well after midnight when one of the players returned from bathroom with an urgent report.
"Roger, listen," he told the host, "Walter's in the kitchen making love to your wife!"
"OK, that's it, guys," Roger said.
"This is positively the last deal."