What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball?
Juan on Juan.
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Twenty feet below sea level, a diver notices another guy at the same depth with no scuba gear.
The diver goes down another 10 feet, and the guy joins him a minute later.
The diver goes below 15 more feet, and a minute later, the same guy joins him.
The diver takes out a waterproof pad and pencil and writes, "How are you able to stay this deep without equipment?"
The guy takes the pencil and pad and writes, "I'm drowning, you moron!"
Golfer: "Well caddy, do you like my game?"
Caddy: "Very good, sir! But personally I prefer golf."
Why did the football coach go to the bank?
"To get his Quarter back."
What's the difference between David Beckham and an airplane model kit?
One's a glueless kit and the other's a clueless git!
Two guys on a double bike where pedaling up a hill.
It took forever to get to the top.
When they finally got to the top the first guy said in a pant, "Whew, that was so hard."
The second replied, "If I hadn't been pushing the brakes the whole time we would have rolled down backwards."
Chuck Norris once ran in a movie marathon.... and won.
Vote:
Why do men need instant replay on TV sports?
Because after 30 seconds they forget what happened.
Vote:
Q:What's the hardest thing about learning to play tennis?
A:Telling your parents that your gay!
A father and his son, Bobby, arrive at the local Rugby match and Dad can't find the tickets.
Dad: "Nip home and see if I left the tickets there."
Bobby: "No probs, Dad."
Half an hour later Bobby returns to his dad who is patiently waiting outside the stadium.
Bobby: "Yep, they're on the kitchen table where you left them."