Joke #2711

A regular Friday night poker game was still going strong well after midnight when one of the players returned from bathroom with an urgent report. "Roger, listen," he told the host, "Walter's in the kitchen making love to your wife!" "OK, that's it, guys," Roger said. "This is positively the last deal."

What can you serve that you cannot eat? A tennis ball.

Everyone could tell our son was a Tigers fan. When he was handed his diploma, he dropped it.

Why is Cinderella such a bad football player? Because she has a pumpkin for a coach and she ran away from the ball.

Oh, you play racquetball? You must be extremely athletic.

What do golfers use in China? China tees!

Micheal Jordan to Chuck Norris: I can spin a ball on my finger for over two hours. Can you? Chuck Norris: (laughs) How do you think the earth spins?

Did you hear about the man who won the gold medal at the Olympics? He had it bronzed.

Twenty teams in the league and you are in the last place? Well, it could have been worse. How? There could have been more teams in the league!

"If we don't change the direction we're going, we're likely to end up at the wrong end." "People who go out of their way to help others have great taste." "An eye for an eye leaves everybody blind, but not hungry." "Don't give up though the pace seems slow, you may succeed at another morgue." "A journey of a hundred trillion cells begins with a single nibble." "The only difference between a big shot and a little shot is that the big shot takes longer to chew." "It's all right to have little butterflies in your stomach. In fact, I'd say a trip to the elementary school play is a wonderful idea." "You don't know what your appetite can get away with until you try. Or are tried." "If you carry your childhood with you, you should probably go the bathroom soon." "Never keep up with Joneses. Have them over for dinner." "Let your hook always be cast. In the pool where you least expect it, will be a very startled swimmer."

What’s a swimmer’s favourite sport? Pool.