Joke #4156

A man is walking through a park when he steps in a pile of dog mess. He pauses to wipe his shoe on the grass and sees another man step into the same pile. ‘I just did that,’ says the man, so the other man rubs his nose in it.

Chuck Norris once uppercut a horse and that is how the giraffe was created.

What do you call a bull that's sent overseas by boat? Shipped beef.

Ronnie goes to the auction. He notices a parrot that was on auction. Ronnie decides to bid for it and so Ronnie starts off with 50 Dollars. Auctioneer: 50 Dollars Voice: 100 Dollars Ronnie: 200 Dollars Voice: 300 Dollars Ronnie: 400 Dollars Voice: 750 Dollars Ronnie: 800 Dollars Auctioneer 800 going once, twice and the parrot is sold. Ronnie to the Auctioneer "I hope this Parrot can speak as I have spent a lot of money on it." Auctioneer Laughing: "Who do you think was Bidding against you.

Using a novelty invisible dog leash and collar Chuck Norris won the Westminster Dog Show.

What did the cow wear to the football game? A Jersey.

Why was the little bear so spoiled? Because its mother panda d to its every whim.

If you put a million monkeys at a million keyboards, one of them will eventually write a Java program. The rest of them will write Perl programs.

What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog? A.A dog is always happy to see you B.A dog only takes a couple of months to train.

How many animals can you get into a pair of tights? 10 little piggies, 2 calves, 1 beaver, 1 ass, 1 p*ssy, thousands of hares and a dead fish no one can ever find.

According to leading scientists, the deadliest animal on the planet is the Bearded Norris.