The web isn’t better than sex, but sliced bread is in serious trouble.
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What do you get when you cross an apple with a nun?
A computer that won’t go down.
A project manager, a computer programmer and a computer operator are driving down the road when the car they are in gets a flat tire.
The three men try to solve the problem.
The project manager said: "Let's catch a cab and in ten minutes we'll reach our destination."
The computer programmer said: "We have here the driver's guide.
I can easily replace the flat tire and continue our drive."
The computer operator said: "First of all, let's turn off the engine and turn it on again.
Maybe it will fix the problem."
Suddenly a Microsoft software engineer passed by and said: "Try to close all windows, get off the car, and then get in and try again."
How come the women loves the PC?
It’s easier to turn on!
At a recent computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated: "If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving twenty-five dollar cars that got 1000 mi/gal."
Recently General Motors addressed this comment by releasing the statement:
"Yes, but would you want your car to crash twice a day?"
The box said "Requires Windows Vista or better".
So I installed LINUX.
Chuck Norris doesn't use GUI, he prefers the command line.
What do computers do when they get hungry?
They eat chips!
Algorithm.
Word used by programmers when they don't want to explain what they did.
Chuck doesn't have e-mail, he has HE-mail.
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