Daddy, why doesn’t this magnet pick up this floppy disk?
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When your hammer is C++, everything begins to look like a thumb.
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What do computers do when they get hungry?
They eat chips!
There are only two kinds of computer.
The latest model, and the obsolete.
Q: How many Object Oriented programmers does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: None, they send it a message, and it changes itself.
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Why did the lumberjack get nowhere with the internet?
He kept logging on and off.
Chuck Norris' Internet connection is faster upstream than downstream because even data has more incentive to run from him than to him.
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A female secretary was helping her new boss set up his computer and asked him what word he would like to use as a password to log in with.
Wanting to embarrass his new secretary a bit and let her know where they stood, he smugly told her to enter ‘penis.’
Without blinking or saying a word, she entered the password.
She then almost died laughing at the computer’s response:
PASSWORD REJECTED.
NOT LONG ENOUGH!
No statement can catch the ChuckNorrisException.
Chuck Norris is the only person in the world that can actually email a roundhouse kick.
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