Daddy, why doesn’t this magnet pick up this floppy disk?
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Programming is like sex.
One mistake and you have to support it for the rest of your life.
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A group of computer science geeks were listening to a lecture about Java programming at a university.
After the lecture, one of the men leaned over and grabbed a woman’s breast.
Woman: Hey! That’s private OK ?
The man hesitated for a second looking confused.
Man: But I thought we were in the same class.
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Yo momma so FAT, she can't save files bigger than 4 GB.
E-mail returned to sender, insufficient voltage.
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Q: What will my computer printer warranty cover?
A: Your mouse pad.
Officer: "I'm arresting you for downloading all of Wikipedia."
Man: "No wait! I can explain everything!"
Bill Gates, Andy Grove, and Jerry Sanders (CEOs of MicroSoft, Intel, and AMD) were in a high-powered business meeting.
During the serious, tense discussion, a beeping noise suddenly is emitted from where Bill is sitting.
Bill says, “Oh, that’s my beeper. Gentlemen, excuse me, I need to take this call.”
So Bill lifts his wristwatch to his ear and begins talking into the end of his tie.
After completing this call, he notices the others are staring at him.
Bill explains, “Oh, this is my new emergency communication system. I have an earpiece built into my watch and a microphone sewn into the end of my tie. That way I can take a call anywhere.”
The others nod and the meeting continues.
Five minutes later, the discussion is again interrupted when Andy starts beeping.
He states, “Excuse me gentlemen, this must be an important call.”
So Andy taps his earlobe and begins talking into thin air.
When he completes his call, he notices the others staring at him and explains, “I also have an emergency communication system. But my earpiece is actually implanted in my earlobe, and the microphone is actually embedded in this fake tooth.”
The others nod, and the meeting continues.
Five minutes later, the discussion is again interrupted when Jerry emits a thunderous fart.
He looks up at the others staring at him and says, “Somebody get me a piece of paper… I’m receiving a FAX."
Hide a seek champion...
;
Since 1958
99 little bugs in the code,
99 bugs in the code,
1 bug fixed...
Compile again,
100 little bugs in the code.