A woman has twins and gives them up for adoption.
One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named ‘Amal’.
The other goes to a family in Spain; they name him ‘Juan’.
Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum.
Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.
Her husband responds, ‘But they are twins.
If you’ve seen Juan, you’ve seen Amal.’
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A man and wife were making love.
When thay saw there 8 year old son at the door crying the dad started laughing and the boy ran away.
Mom said "You better fix this now."
The dad couldn't find the boy anywhere unwell he hurd a loud noise conning from grandma's room so he opened up the door and there was the boy putting his "wood" to grandma.
The dad screamed "What the fuck."
The boy said "It aims so funny when it's your mom is it."
Q: What does Superman, Batman, and Ironman have in common?
A: When they were kids they wanted to be Chuck Norris
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A man and his son were walking through a field, and saw two dogs mating.
The little boy asked his Dad what was happening.
The father replied, “Well, son, they’re making a puppy.”
The following evening, the little boy was thirsty, so he went from his bed to get a glass of water.
Not being able to reach the glasses, he walked unannounced into his parents bedroom, who were making love in their usual missionary position.
Confused, the boy asked what were they doing.
The dad responded very slowly and caringly to his impressionanle little boy, “Well, son, we are making you a little brother.”
The little boy replied ,”Please turn Mom over, Dad, I’d rather have a puppy!”
On a men's bathroom wall, someone had hastily scrawled, "I slept with your mother."
Underneath it, another person had written, "Go home dad, you're drunk."
A math teacher asks a pupil, what are 3, 5, 7 and 11?
The pupil thinks for a moment and then replies, "On 3 there is cartoon network, on 5 we have cartoon network, on 7 dad checks out news-bulletin and the channel that comes by pressing 11 on the remote is FTV, which my brother watches late at night."
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I was walking by a car filled with black kids, and I heard a *click* as they locked the doors.
I felt like such a bad-ass until I realized it was my car.
Vote:
"Johny, what is the difference between being sober and being drunken?"
Johny: "When I was drunk I didn't need to buy a ticket to the carousel."
"Ok, and when you were sober and wanted to go to the carousel what has happened then?"
"The carousel man needed to center the whole carousel, of course.
The left half of the carousel was for me and the right one for all the small children."
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Kid: "please could I go 2 the toilet"
teacher: "say the alphabet"
Kid: "abcdefghijklmnoqrstuvwxyz"
teacher: "where's the p?"
kid: "running half way down my leg"
Yo' Mama is so fat, when she wears a yellow raincoat, the kids yell, "Here comes the school bus."