Joke #4480

I love my cat. My cat does not care.
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has 36.09 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: animal

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A snail walks into a bar and the barman tells him there's a strict policy about having snails in the bar and so kicks him out. A year later the same snail re-enters the bar and asks the barman "What did you do that for?"
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has 36.51 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: animal, bar, time
Why was the horse all charged up? It ate some haywire!
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Q: What do you call a guy with his hand up a Camel's arse? A: An Arab mechanic.
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How are black people and wolves similar? They both fight in packs.
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has 60.97 % from 209 votes. More jokes about: animal, black people, racist
Q: Why don't they let Blondes swim in the ocean? A: Because they can't get the smell out of the tuna.
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has 51.61 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: animal, blonde
Why is a reindeer like a gossip? Because they are both tail bearers.
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has 44.46 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: animal
A man walks into a bar, after buying a beer he looks around the bar and sees three men and a dog playing cards. Amazed, the man wanders over and starts watching the game. Aftere watching the game for ten minutes, the man leans over to one of the other player's and whispers " Wow, that's a really smart dog!". The man whispers backs "He isn't that smart, every time he gets a good hand, he wags his tail!"
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has 78.15 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: animal, bar, dog, game
At the pet shop, a man spots a parrot without any feet. The man leans in, "Hey buddy, how do you hang onto your perch without any feet?" "I wrap my little parrot penis around this wooden bar, kind of like a hook." "Wow," says the guy. "I can't believe you're so smart! I'm taking you home." Weeks go by, and the parrot not only understands everything the man says, but he gives good advice. The guy is delighted. One day the guy comes home from work and the parrot says, "Hey, I don't know if I should tell you this or not, but it's about your wife and the mailman." "What happened?" asks the guy. "Well," the parrot says, "when the mailman came to the door today, your wife greeted him in a sheer nightgown and kissed him on the mouth." "What happened then?" asks the guy. "Then, the mailman came into the house and lifted up your wife's nightgown," reports the parrot. "Oh no!" the guy says. "Then what?" "I don't know," says the parrot. "I got a hard-on and fell off my perch."
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has 62.30 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: animal, parrot, wife
A guy walks into a bar with a giraffe, and the giraffe gets waay too drunk. The bartender says, "Hey! you can't leave that lyin' there!" The guy goes, "that's not a lion its a giraffe!"
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has 58.67 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, animal, bar, bartender, drunk
The little snail begs for his mother: Mother, please let me pass the rail road! Thunder dear, not now. In five hours the train passes.
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has 22.36 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: animal