Why doesn't Sweden export it's cattle? It wants to keep it's Stockholm!
Q: What is a turkey's favorite dessert? A: Peach gobbler.
Chuck Norris once round house kicked a bear while on a survival trek in Siberia. That incident was known as the Tunguska event.
Q: Why should you never set the turkey next to the desert? A: Because he will gobble, gobble it up!
What kind of cows do you find in Alaska? Eski-moos.
In what state will you find the most cows? Moo York.
What do cows wear when they are on vacation in Hawaii? Moo moos.
An IRS agent is lying on his psychiatrist's couch bemoaning the fact that everyone in the world hates him. "Nonsense", says his doctor. "Everyone in the world doesn't hate you. Everyone in the United States, perhaps, but certainly not everyone in the world."
A homo went to Denmark to have a sex change operation performed. When 'SHE' returned, a friend asked, "How did it go?" "Oh awful, just awful!" she replied. "What was so awful?" asked the friend, "Did it hurt a lot when they removed the extra parts?" "Oh no," she replied, "That wasn't bad at all." "Well, did it hurt when they put in the silicone implants?" the friend asked. "Oh no, that wasn't bad either!" she replied. "Well then," asked the friend, "What was so awful?" "It was when they cut a hole in my head and took out half my brain!"
Q: What was the dentist doing in Panama? A: Looking for the Root Canal!
What do you call a dog wearing ear muffs? Anything you want, he cant hear you.