Joke #9851

Why doesn't Sweden export it's cattle? It wants to keep it's Stockholm!
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has 35.20 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: animal, geography

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An Australian guy walks into a bar with a crocodile under his arm. He asks the bartender if he will give him free drinks if he shows he can put his penis inside the crocs mouth for 15 seconds without it getting bit off. The bartender agrees. The guy opens the crocs mouth and puts his penis inside it; the croc gently closes his mouth and after 15 seconds the Australian hits him over the head with a bottle, causing the croc to open his mouth and let the guy withdraw his penis. The bartender starts serving the free drinks to the Austr alian and then tells everyone in the bar "If anyone else can do that then I will give them free drinks also". There is a pause and then a blonde woman calls out "ok, I will do it but please don't hit me so hard over my head with the bottle".
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has 78.72 % from 157 votes. More jokes about: animal, bar, blonde, dirty, geography
Q: What is a turkey's favorite dessert? A: Peach gobbler.
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has 63.75 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: animal, geography, Thanksgiving
Chuck Norris once round house kicked a bear while on a survival trek in Siberia. That incident was known as the Tunguska event.
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has 55.34 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, geography
Q: Why should you never set the turkey next to the desert? A: Because he will gobble, gobble it up!
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has 51.67 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: animal, geography, Thanksgiving
What kind of cows do you find in Alaska? Eski-moos.
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has 48.26 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: animal, geography
What do cows wear when they are on vacation in Hawaii? Moo moos.
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In what state will you find the most cows? Moo York.
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has 32.79 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: animal, geography
A little lizard was walking through the forest to see his pal the monkey. The monkey call out hey little buddy come up here I got some great pot. So the little lizard climbed up the tree. The little lizard and the monkey smoked a great big joint. The little lizard said hey this stuff is great but I have horrible cottonmouth. Well there is a river just down there. So the little lizard walk down the tree through the brush and started to drink the water. All of a sudden a crocodile came out of the water. Hey little buddy waz up said the croc, "I just got stoned with my pal the monkey." "Really" said the croc, "where is he I want some." He is through the brush and up the tree. So the croc walked through the brush and to the tree. The monkey said "holy shit how much did you drink little buddy."
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has 60.56 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, animal, weed
The T. Rexes were all angry. You know why? Because these huge muscular creatures with these big muscular legs and these tiny little hands! How would you feel, 60 million years never being able to masturbate? That is the real reason dinosaurs are extinct right there.
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has 39.90 % from 9 votes. More jokes about: animal
When Chuck Norris wants an egg, he cracks open a chicken.
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has 69.44 % from 62 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, food