What do you call a blonde skeleton in the closet?
Last year’s hide and seek champ.
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Q: Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito?
A: A mosquito stops sucking when you slap it...
A man was in his front yard mowing grass when his attractive blonde neighbor came out of the house and went straight to the mailbox.
She opened it, then slammed it shut and stormed back into the house.
A little later she came out of her house again, went to the mailbox, opened it, and slammed it shut again. Angrily, back into the house she went.
As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, she came out again, marched to the mailbox, opened it, and then slammed it closed harder than ever.
Puzzled by her actions, the man asked her, “Is something wrong?”
To which she replied, “There certainly is!”
My stupid computer keeps saying, “You’ve got mail!”
What does a blonde say after having sex?
What team do you guys play for?
A blonde was so proud of herself because she finished a jigsaw in 6 months and the cover said 2-4 years!
Q. What's a blonde's idea of safe sex?
A. Locking the car door.
Q: Why did the blonde take more than one pregnancy test?
A: Because she slept with more than one guy.
Q: How can you tell a blonde's been in your fridge?
A: There is lipstick on the cucumber.
A blonde wanted to sell her car, but couldn't find any buyers.
She called her friend for advice, and her friend asked her how many miles she had on her car.
"235,000 miles."
Her friend told her that was the problem.
But the blonde's friend told her that her brother is a mechanic and could put back the miles to whatever she wanted.
So the blonde went to the mechanic and told him to put the miles at 40,000.
Two days later the blond's friend asked her if she sold the car since her brother dropped the miles.
The blonde told her, "Why would I sell the car? There are only 40,000 miles on it!"
Blonde: "What does IDK stand for?"
Brunette: "I don’t know."
Blonde: "OMG, nobody does!"