Joke #4625

‘I’m a bad lover. Once I caught a peeping Tom booing me.’ Rodney Dangerfield

Roses are red lemons are sour. Open your legs and give me an hour.

A man calls 911 emergency: " Come immediately, my little son has swallowed a condom!" After five minutes, the same man calls back: "It is ok, I found another one."

Warning ladies! Never trust a man who calls you "SEXY". This is why. When he removes the letter 'Y' it means you're down for "SEX". After sex, he will remove the letter "S" and start calling you his "EX".

My girlfriend always wanted to know the future job of her baby; so the other day when we were making sex suddenly she farted. I told her: "Your baby will be a bugler."

Yo mama so fat, when your dad tried eating your mom's pussy his head stuck in.

I went into the bar the other day & the bartender said: "What'ya have?" I said: "Suprise me." He did, He showed me a naked picture of my wife. I said: "Hey, who said you could mess around with my wife?" "Everyone did" he replied..."

I think you’ll find that any of my lady companions will tell you I’m a ‘five times a night man’. I really shouldn’t drink so much tea before I go to bed.

A girl married with a man who had only one foot. Next day her mother rang her and asked: "My little tell me how did U feel the marriage?" Her daughter replied: "Woo real splendid; alas he has only one foot!" Her mom answered: "You must be too lucky, when I married your dad; he had only one inch!"

"Will you marry me?" Is a marriage proposal. "Will, You, Mary, Me" is a foursome proposal.

Q: What do you call a prostitute with a runny nose? A: Full.