What does a blonde use for protection during sex?
A bus shelter.
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Q: Why did the blonde keep an empty carton of milk in the fridge?
A: In case she wanted black coffee.
Q: How do you describe 3 prostitutes and a blonde?
A: Ho, Ho, Ho, and to all a good night.
What would you do if a Blonde threw a hand grenade right at you?
"Just pull the pin and throw it back."
Q: How did the blonde kill her toy poodle?
A: Trying to put batteries in it.
Vote:
Two blondes wait at a bus stop.
A bus pulls up and opens the door.
One of the blondes leans inside and asks the driver, "Will this bus take me to 5th Avenue?"
The bus driver shakes his head and says, "No, I'm sorry."
The other blonde leans inside and asks, "How about ME?"
There was this nouveau riche blond girl, who went to the nearest Mercedes showroom with a pocketful of dollars, and came out with the latest model.
Half an hour later she was back at the showroom, claiming a that the car they sold her was terrible, that she was disappointed a brand-new Mercedes would get a fault in the gearbox after 15 minutes.
The management apologized and gave her a new car.
Again, after half an hour she came back.
The management offered her a new car, but sent along one of their engineers to see if they could figure out what the problem was.
She put in the first gear...speed up...put in second...third...fourth...fifth...
“And now,” she said, “for the rocket,” and threw it in reverse.
Vote:
A blonde, brunette, and redhead are all on a building about to jump off.
They all jump at the same time.
Which one landed last?
The blonde because she asked for directions.
A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are all stuck on a deserted island together.
The island is 20 miles from the nearest inhabited island so they all decide to try to swim there.
The redhead makes it 10 miles, is exhausted, gives up, and drowns.
The brunette makes it 15 miles before she's too tired to go any farther and drowns.
The blonde gets 19 miles away from the deserted island, decides she's too tired to go any farther, and swims all the way back to the deserted island.
Vote:
Chuck Norris is under contract with Zales and DeBeer not to eat coal.