Two packets walk into a bar. One of the packets asks the bartender for a drink, and gets no response The other packet tries and the bartender shrugs him off. One packet leans to the other and says, "The quality of service here is terrible!"
Q: 0 is false and 1 is true, right? A: 1.
My attitude isn't bad. It's in beta.
What goes ‘choo choo choo’ while online? Thomas the search engine.
What did the psychiatrist say to the android kleptomaniac? DON'T keep taking the tablets!
Yo mama's so fat when she made a YouTube account the entire network crashed.
Q: What did the dentist say to the computer? A: This won't hurt a byte
My software never has bugs. It just develops random features.
Pentiums melt in your PC, not in your hand.
An unfailingly polite lady called to ask for help with a Windows installation that had gone terribly wrong. Customer: "I brought my Windows disks from work to install them on my home computer." Training stresses that we are "not the Software Police," so I let the little act of piracy slide. Tech Support: "Umm-hmm. What happened?" Customer: "As I put each disk in it turns out they weren't initialized." Tech Support: "Do you remember the message exactly, ma'am?" Customer: (proudly) "I wrote it down. 'This is not a Macintosh disk. Would you like to initialize it?'" Tech Support: "Er, what happened next?" Customer: "After they were initialized, all the disks appeared to be blank. And now I brought them back to work, and I can't read them in the A: drive; the PC wants to format them. And this is our only set of Windows disks for the whole office. Did I do something wrong?"
Someday, the people who know how to use computers will rule over those who don’t. And there will be a special name for them – secretaries.