Joke #4825

A true gentleman holds the door for his woman... then smacks her ass as she walks by.
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has 64.28 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: men

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A man goes to his doctor after losing a lot of weight. "I feel great, but I have a problem, doctor. I was so fat beforehand that my skin has stretched and stayed that long. Is there anything you can give me?" "Hmm, short of plastic surgery, there is only one alternative. Please take off your clothes." The man strips down. The doctor pulls all his skin upwards and ties it in a ball above his head. "But doctor -- now my navel is in the middle of my forehead!" "True," replies the doctor, "and you should see what you have for a collar and tie."
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has 39.32 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: men
What is a man's definition of safe sex? A padded headboard.
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has 57.36 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: men
If men got pregnant.... abortion would be available in convenience stores and drive-through windows.
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has 54.59 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: men
What is a "successful hunting trip"? When three men kill 9 cases of Budweiser in two days
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has 62.22 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: beer, hunting, men
A man is driving up a steep, narrow mountain road. A woman is driving down the same road. As they pass each other, the woman leans out of the window and yells "PIG!" The man immediately leans out of his window and replies, "BITCH!" They each continue on their way, and ... as the man rounds the next corner, he crashes into a pig in the middle of the road ... and dies immediately. If only men would listen...
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has 66.64 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: animal, car, men, women
"What is the thickest book in the world? What Men Think They Know About Women."
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has 50.45 % from 9 votes. More jokes about: men
The patient’s family gathered to hear what the specialists had to say. "Things don’t look good. The only chance is a brain transplant. This is an experimental procedure. It might work, but the bad news is that brains are very expensive, and you will have to pay the costs yourselves." "Well, how much does a brain cost?" asked the relatives. "For a male brain, $500,000. For a female brain, $200,000." Some of the younger male relatives tried to look shocked, but all the men nodded because they thought they understood. A few actually smirked. But the patient’s daughter was unsatisfied and asked, "Why the difference in price between male brains and female brains?" "A standard pricing practice," said the head of the team. "Women’s brains have to be marked down because they have actually been used."
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has 67.34 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: age, family, men, money, women
One guy says to a bald guy "Your hair ran away to find someone with a brain."
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has 45.29 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: insulting, mean, men, stupid
How many men would it take to mop a floor? No one knows; they've never done it.
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has 74.84 % from 8 votes. More jokes about: men
Q. Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring and good-looking? A. They already have boyfriends.
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has 64.76 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: gay, men