A true gentleman holds the door for his woman... then smacks her ass as she walks by.
Q: How many men does it take to open a beer? A: None, it better be open when she brings it to you.
What does a man make best for dinner? Reservations.
Q: Why shouldn't Men using iron supplements take Viagra? A: It may cause them to spin around and point north.
If you want to know why men are called the 'opposite sex', express an opinion!
How are husbands like lawn mowers? They're hard to get started, they emit noxious odors, and half the time they don't work.
How can you tell if a man is lying? You can see his lips moving.
Q. What is the one thing that all men at singles bars have in common? A. They're married.
How do you know if your man is dead? The sex is the same, but there's less ironing.
Two gays were at a dance. As they were jigging about the floor with each other. Two massive guys entered the hall 6 foot 6 20 stone and full of muscle One gay asked his mate "Is that the bouncers that have just come in?" "No" grinned the other,"That's the raffle."
What are two reasons why men don't mind their own business? 1) No mind. 2) No business.