Adam goes to God and says, "I would like a mate to please me and make living joyful. She should be beautiful and perfect in every way. God says, "I can do that, but it will cost you a testicle, a kidney, and one eye." To which Adam replied, "Well, what can I get for a rib?"
Sex is when a guys communication, enters a girls information, to increase the population, for a younger generation, do you get the information... or do you need a demonstration.
"What is a man's idea of a balanced diet?" "A Budweiser in each hand!"
A man is in a mall and sees a clothes store. He sees a magnificent, brand new jacket in the shop window and decides he shall try it on and buy it. So he walks into the shop and asks an employee: "Excuse me sir." "How can I help you" the employee replies. "Could I by any chance try on that jacket in your shop window?" The employee looks at him and says "No you shall not you are to try it on in the changing rooms like everybody else!"
Q: How many men does it take to put down a toilet seat? A: Who knows it's never been done.
After spending 20 minutes trying to get my wife's bra off, I decided to give up, I wish I'd never put it on now.
What do you call the useless piece of skin on a penis? The man.
What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog? After a year, the dog is still excited to see you.
How is a man like a snowstorm? You don't know when he's coming, how many inches you'll get, or how long it'll stay.
What does a man make best for dinner? Reservations.