I changed my password to "incorrect". So whenever I forget what it is the computer will say "Your password is incorrect".
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If you put a million monkeys at a million keyboards, one of them will eventually write a Java program.
The rest of them will write Perl programs.
An unfailingly polite lady called to ask for help with a Windows installation that had gone terribly wrong.
Customer: "I brought my Windows disks from work to install them on my home computer." Training stresses that we are "not the Software Police," so I let the little act of piracy slide.
Tech Support: "Umm-hmm. What happened?"
Customer: "As I put each disk in it turns out they weren't initialized."
Tech Support: "Do you remember the message exactly, ma'am?"
Customer: (proudly) "I wrote it down.
'This is not a Macintosh disk. Would you like to initialize it?'"
Tech Support: "Er, what happened next?"
Customer: "After they were initialized, all the disks appeared to be blank.
And now I brought them back to work, and I can't read them in the A: drive; the PC wants to format them.
And this is our only set of Windows disks for the whole office.
Did I do something wrong?"
Q: What's object-oriented way to become wealthy?
A: Inheritance.
A rather obese man is very excited about his new job and wants to start work immediately.
However, when he sits down at his computer, the only program installed was spreadsheets.
Confused, the man calls over his boss and asks:"Why there is only excel installed on this computer?"
His boss replies, "It was the only program in your size!"
Linux is like wigwam: no Gates, no Windows and Apache inside.
Vote:
CAPS LOCK – Preventing Login Since 1980.
Yo mama so stupid, the password needed 8 characters, so she put Snow white and the 7 dwarves.
The box said "Requires Windows Vista or better".
So I installed LINUX.
Two geeks are talking over lunch.
The first guy says, "You wouldn't believe what happened this morning.
A girl rode up to me on her bike, took off all her clothes, and said 'Take whatever you want!' …
So I took the bike"
The second guy says, "Good choice, her clothes probably wouldn't have fit you."
