The extra RAM slots have tractor parts stored in them.
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Me: Siri, why am I alone?
Siri: *opens front facing camera*
Where's the best place to hide a body?
Page two of Google.
A man goes inside a pet shop and starts to move around the cages to scout the pets.
He sees a monkey with a price of 5000$ and goes to the merchant to ask for details.
Hey mister, the monkey…what does it know to worth that much money?
Well, it knows Windows 95, 98, 2000, and also knows Word, C++, Visual Basic and last but not least, it knows how to play computer games.
- Good monkey, it's worth the money.
He goes and finds another monkey with a price of 10000$ and again he will ask the merchant.
"What does this monkey know?"
"It knows Linux, Unix, Corel and Autocad."
"Nice, even I don't know those things."
On a last scout run he finds another monkey just sitting there with a price 20000$.
The story repeats, and he goes with a lack of confidence to ask the merchant for details.
"And what does this monkey do for that ridiculous amount of money?"
"I never saw her doing anything, but the other two call her Project Manager!"
Vote:
Why did Steve Jobs live his last moments in regret?
They say your life flashes before your eyes just before you die.
Unfortunately for Steve Jobs, his iPhone 4S didn't have a Flash player installed!
"Knock, knock.Who's there?"
very long pause...
"Java."
Vote:
Why did the computer get cold?
Because it forgot to close windows.
What did the spider do on the computer?
Made a website!
A programmer had a problem.
He decided to use Java.
He now has a ProblemFactory.
Q: What's the Internet's favorite animal?
A: The lynx.
