A woman walks into a pet store wanting to buy a pet for her husband, but she finds all the pets are so so expensive.
The woman says to the clerk at the counter, "I'm looking to buy a pet for my husband but I'm on a very short budget!."
"No worries," replies the clerk.
"We've just ordered in a very large bullfrog that can give bl*wjobs."
"Bl*wjobs," says the woman, buying the frog, thinking it would be a great gag gift, so she goes home and gives the frog to her husband explaining the frogs talent.
With a laugh the husband walks off leaving the frog in the kitchen.
In the middle of the night the woman wakes up to the sound of pots and pans flying around in the kitchen.
She goes down to find her husband and the frog reading cookbooks.
"What are you two doing?" she asks.
"Well," says the husband.
"If I can teach this frog to cook you are outta here."
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So men can understand them.
Q: Why the men's voice is louder than women?
A: men have an antenna!
Vote:
What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name?
You didn't hold the pillow down long enough.
Q. Why were men given larger brains than dogs?
A. So they wouldn't hump women's legs at cocktail parties.
Q. Why did the man cross the road?
A. He heard the chicken was a slut.
A man parachuted out of an aeroplane and his chute did not open.
As he headed for almost certain death, he saw a man coming up toward him through the air from the ground.
As the man zoomed by, the man headed down asked, "Do you know anything about parachutes?"
The man replied in passing, "No, you know anything about gas stoves?"
Q: Why do men like blonde jokes?
A: Because they can understand them.
Husband: What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you?
Wife: Turn sideways and look in the mirror.